Scr. Romae Non. Dec. a. 693
Magna mihi varietas voluntatis et dissimilitude opinionis ac iudicii Quinti fratris mei demonstrate est ex litteris tuis, in quibus ad me epistularum illius exempla misisti. Qua ex re et molestia sum tanta
like yourself, and not give a button for consulships.
You write that you have made up your mind not to go to Asia. I would rather you did go, and I am afraid it may cause unpleasantness if you do not. But I cannot blame your determination, especially as I have refused to go to a province.
I shall be contented with the inscriptions you have put in your Amaltheum, especially as Thyillus has deserted me and Archias has not written anything about me. I am afraid, now he has written his Greek poem on the Luculli, he is turning to the Caecilian drama. I have thanked Antonius on your behalf, and given that letter to Mallius. My letters to you up to now have been fewer than they should have been, as I had no trusty messenger nor any certain address to send them to. I have sung your praises loudly. If Cincius delegates any of your business to me, I will undertake it. But just at present he is more concerned with his own, in which I am ready to assist him. Expect frequent letters from me, if you are settled: and send me even more. Please write me a description of your Amaltheum, its adornment and situation; and send me any poems and tales you have about Amalthea. I should like to make one too in my place at Arpinum. I will send you some of my writings: but there is nothing finished.
XVII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Rome, Dec. 5, B.C. 61
Your letter and the enclosed copy of one of my brother Quintus’ letters show me that he has continually changed his mind and wavered in his opinion and judgement. I am exceedingly disturbed
adfectus, quantam mihi meus amor summus erga utrumque vestrum adferre debuit, et admiratione, quidnam accidisset, quod adferret Quinto fratri meo aut offensionem tam gravem aut commutationem tantam voluntatis. Atque illud a me iam ante intellegebatur, quod te quoque ipsum discedentem a nobis suspicari videbam, subesse nescio quid opinionis incommodae sauciumque esse eius animum et insedisse quasdam odiosas suspiciones. Quibus ego mederi cum cuperem antea saepe et vehementius etiam post sortitionem provinciae, nec tantum intellegebam ei esse offensionis, quantum litterae tuae declararant, nec tantum proficiebam, quantum volebam. Sed tamen hoc me ipse consolabar, quod non dubitabam, quin te ille aut Dyrrachi aut in istis locis uspiam visurus esset; quod cum accidisset, confidebam ac mihi persuaseram fore ut omnia placarentur inter vos non modo sermone ac disputatione, sed conspectu ipso congressuque vestro. Nam quanta sit in Quinto fratre meo comitas, quanta iucunditas, quam mollis animus et ad accipiendam et ad deponendam offensionem, nihil attinet me ad te, qui ea nosti, scribere. Sed accidit perincommode, quod eum nusquam vidisti. Valuit enim plus, quod erat illi non nullorum artificiis inculcatum, quam aut officium aut necessitudo aut amor vester ille pristinus, qui plurimum valere debuit. Atque huius incommodi culpa ubi resideat, facilius possum existimare quam scribere; vereor enim, ne, dum defendam meos, non parcam tuis. Nam sic intellego, ut nihil a domesticis
about it, as indeed I could not help being, considering my affection for both of you, and I wonder what can have happened to cause my brother Quintus such grave offence and to make him change his mind so extraordinarily. I grasped some time ago, what I think you were beginning to suspect, when you left, that at the bottom of it must be some idea of an insult, and that his feelings were wounded and some unpleasant suspicions had taken deep root. Though I often before sought to heal the wound, and redoubled my efforts after the allotment of his province, I could neither find that he was as much annoyed as your letter makes out, nor yet make as much headway with him as I wished. However, I used to console myself with the thought that he would be sure to see you either at Dyrrachium or somewhere thereabout. And I had quite made up my mind that when that occurred, all the difficulties between you would be smoothed over as much by the mere sight of one another and the pleasure of meeting as by conversation and discussion. For I need not tell you, who know it yourself, how amiable and kindly my brother Quintus is, and how sensitive he is and ready both to take offence and to forget it. But it has happened most unfortunately that you have not seen him anywhere. For the impression he has received from some designing persons has had more weight with him than either his duty or your old intimacy and affection which ought to have had the greatest weight of all. Where the blame for this unpleasantness rests, it is easier for me to imagine than to write. For I am afraid that in defending my relatives I may not spare yours. For my view is that, even if no wound was inflicted