II
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Arcano Quinti fr. postr. Non. Apr. a. 705
Ego cum accepissem tuas litteras Nonis Aprilibus, quas Cephalio attulerat, essemque Menturnis postridie mansurus, ut inde protinus, sustinui me in Arcano fratris, ut, dum aliquid certius adferretur, occultiore in loco essemus, agerenturque nihilo minus, quae sine nobis agi possunt.
await eagerly. I expect it has been dispatched now. With Sextus you have preserved the same dignity that you prescribe for me. Your friend Celer has more wit than wisdom. What you heard from Tullia about the boys is true. Mucius' ending,[122] which you mention, does not seem to me so sad as it sounds. It is this distraction in which we now find ourselves that is like death. For I have the alternative, either to take part in politics with a free hand among the disloyal, or to side with the loyal at all costs. I ought either to follow the loyalists in their rashness or attack the other party in its daring. Either course spells danger: but my present action brings shame without safety.
[122] Cf. ix, 12.
The man who sent his son to Brundisium to negotiate peace (my views on peace are yours, that it is patent pretence, but that war is being prosecuted with the utmost activity) that man I think and not I will be chosen as commissioner. So far to my relief I have heard nothing. So I fancy it less necessary to write or consider my possible course of action, if I should happen to be chosen.