De hortis etiam atque etiam rogo. Omnibus meis eorumque, quos scio mihi non defuturos, facultatibus (sed potero meis) enitendum mihi est. Sunt etiam, quae vendere facile possim. Sed ut non vendam eique usuram pendam, a quo emero, non plus annum, possum adsequi, quod volo, si tu me adiuvas. Paratissimi sunt Drusi; cupit enim vendere. Proximos puto Lamiae; sed abest. Tu tamen, si quid potes, odorare. Ne Silius quidem quicquam utitur suis et is[[65]] usuris facillime sustentabitur. Habe tuum negotium, nec, quid res mea familiaris postulet, quam ego non curo, sed quid velim, existima.
[65]. suis et is Wesenberg: et iis MSS.
XXIII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. Asturae XIV K. Apr. a. 709
Putaram te aliquid novi, quod eius modi fuerat initium litterarum, "quamvis non curarem, quid in Hispania fieret, tamen te scripturum"; sed videlicet meis litteris respondisti ut de foro et de curia. Sed domus est, ut ais, forum. Quid ipsa domo mihi opus est carenti foro? Occidimus, occidimus, Attice, iam pridem nos quidem, sed nunc fatemur, posteaquam unum, quo tenebamur, amisimus. Itaque solitudinem sequor, et tamen, si qua me res isto adduxerit, enitar, si quo modo potero (potero autem), ut praeter te nemo dolorem meum sentiat, si ullo modo poterit, ne tu
rate from Postumia, the former from M. Cotta or Syrus or Satyrus.
About the gardens I earnestly entreat your aid. I must employ all my own resources and those of friends, who I know will not desert me: but I can manage with my own. There are things I could sell easily too. But without selling anything, if I pay interest to the person from whom I buy for no more than a year, I can get what I want, if you assist me. The most available are those of Drusus, as he wants to sell. The next I think are Lamia's; but he is away. However scent out anything you can. Silius again never uses his at all, and he will very easily be satisfied with the interest. Regard it as your own business, and don't consider what suits my purse, for that I don't care, but what suits me.
XXIII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Astura, March 19, B.C. 45
From the beginning of your letter "though I did not care what happened in Spain, still you would write," I thought you had some news from me: but I see you have answered my letter only as regards the forum and the Senate. But, you say, my house at Rome is a forum. What is the good of the house alone to me, if I have not the forum? I am dead and done for, Atticus, and have been this long while: but now I confess it, when I have lost the one link that bound me to life. So what I want is solitude. Still if in my despite anything drags me to Rome, I shall strive, if possible (and I will make it possible), to keep my grief from all eyes but yours, and, if it is anyhow possible, even from yours.