Avoid the habit of regarding yourself as an invalid, and of taking nostrums. A knowledge and observance of the rules of Dietetics are often better than the concentered wisdom of a Dispensary, abstinence more effective than medical applications, and the recuperative power of Nature, when left to work out her own restoration, frequently superior to the most skillful aid of learned research. But when compelled to avail yourself of medical assistance, seek that which science and integrity render safest. No sensible man, one would think, will intrust the best boon of earth to the merciless experiments of unprincipled and ignorant charlatans, or credulously swallow quack medicines recommended by old women: and yet, while people employ the most accomplished hatter, tailor, and boot-maker, whose services they can secure, they will give up the inner man to the influence of such impositions upon the credulity of humanity!
Assuming, as an accepted truth, that it is your purpose, through life, to admit the rights of our fair tyrants
"In court or cottage, wheresoe'er their home,"
I will commend to you the early acquisition of habits appropriate to our relations to women as their protectors. In dancing, riding, driving, walking, boating, travelling, etc., etc.,—wherever the sexes are brought together in this regard (and where are they not, indeed, when commingled at all?)—observe the gentle courtesies, exhibit the watchful care, that go far towards constituting the settled charms of such intercourse. It is not to be forgotten, as I think I have before remarked, that women judge of character, often, from trifling details; thus, any well-bred woman will be able to tell you which of her acquaintances habitually removes his hat, or throws aside his cigar, when addressing her, and who, of all others, is most watchful for her comfort, when she is abroad under his escort. Be sure, too, that this same fair one could confess, if she would make a revelation on the subject, exactly what men she shuns because they break her fans, disarrange her bouquets, tear her flounces, touch her paintings and prints with moist fingers (instead of merely pointing to some part) handle delicate bijouterie with dark gloves, dance with uncovered hands, etc., etc. But even if you are her confidant, she will not tell you how often her quick sensibility is wounded by fancying herself the subject of the smirks, whispers, and knowing glances in which some men indulge when grouped with their kindred bipeds, in society!
At the risk of subjecting myself to the charge of repetition, I will endeavor, before concluding this letter, to enumerate such Habits as, in addition to those of which I have already spoken, I deem most entitled to the attention of those who are establishing a system of life.
Habits of reading and studying once thoroughly formed, are invaluable, not only as affording a ready resource against ennui, or idleness, everywhere and under all circumstances, but as necessarily involving the acquisition of knowledge, even when of the most desultory character. It is wonderful how much general information may be gleaned by this practice of reading something whenever one has a few spare grains of the "gold-dust of Time,"—minutes. I once found a remarkably well-informed woman of my acquaintance waiting to make breakfast for her husband and me, with a little old dictionary open in her hand. "For what word are you looking, so early?" I inquired, as I discovered the character of the volume she held. "For no one in particular," returned she, "but one can always add to one's stores from any book, were it only in the matter of spelling." But the true way, of course, to derive most advantage from this enjoyment is to systematize in relation to it, reading well-selected books with care and attention sufficient to enable us permanently to add the information they contain to our previous mental possessions.
You will only need to be reminded how much ease and elegance in Reading aloud depend upon habit.
Without the Habit of Industry, good resolutions, the most sincere desire for self-improvement, and the most desirable natural gifts, will be of comparatively little avail for the practical purposes of existence. This unpretending attribute, together with System and Regularity, has achieved more for the good of the race, than all the erratic efforts of genius combinedly.
"Don't run about," says a sensible writer, "and tell your acquaintances you have been unfortunate; people do not like to have unfortunate men for acquaintances. Add to a vigorous determination, a cheerful spirit; if reverses come, bear them like a philosopher, and get rid of them as soon as you can." Cheerfulness and Contentment, like every other mental quality, may be cultivated until they materially assist us in enduring
"The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,"