But as there was no possible answer to this question she turned once more to the idea of diverting her companion.
Barbara did not seem to be noticing anything. She was downcast and wandered along with her eyes fixed upon the ground.
“I do not think you ought to worry so or take your breakdown so seriously, Barbara,” Nona began. “Why, it might have happened to any one in the world and only shows how keenly you feel things. Next time you will be better prepared.”
But the other girl shook her head. “I had no right to come to Europe to help with the Red Cross nursing if I haven’t nerve enough not to flunk. Think of it, Nona, the very first time I was called upon to give assistance of real importance, to faint!” The girl’s voice expressed the limit of self-contempt. “And this when Eugenia and Lady Mathers were the two other nurses. I would almost rather have died than have had it happen. I believe Eugenia had to stop and drag me out of the surgeon’s way. But she has been very kind since, and after all my brave talk on the steamer has not yet mentioned my downfall. I suppose I ought to go home and carry out my threat.”
The tears were sliding down Barbara’s cheeks, but in spite of this Nona smiled.
“You are the last person in the world to play quitter,” she returned quietly. “Now look here, Barbara, you and I know that since we arrived at the hospital we have both been feeling that perhaps we were not wanted and that all our efforts and dreams of helping are going to amount to little.” She stopped and for a moment laid both hands on her friend’s shoulders. “Well, let’s you and I show people differently. I haven’t had much experience and so I am perfectly willing to help in any way I can be useful until I learn more. You know you went to pieces the other day, not because you did not have courage to help, but because you have been seeing so many horrors all at once and you have not yet gotten used to them. That poor fellow——”
But Barbara’s eyes were imploring her friend to silence. “Let’s don’t talk about him any more,” she begged. “I was used up, there had been so many others and then this soldier somehow reminded me of some one I knew.”
Barbara drew a deep breath and squared her shoulders. It may be that the thought of the some one had given her new resolution. “Of course, you know I mean to keep on trying,” she added finally.
Then taking off her nurse’s cap and flinging back her head, the girl called to Nona, “Catch up with me if you like; I am going to run. It always makes me feel better when I’ve been having the blues.” And the next instant she had turned off from the road along which they had been walking and was flying across one of the meadows as swiftly as a child chasing butterflies.
Just at first Nona attempted running after her. She too wanted to feel the blood racing in her veins and the wind fanning her cheeks. But her companion’s flight was too swift. Nona slowed down and followed more quietly.