These kindly, commonplace words reminded her of Aunt Emmeline, and her old untroubled life in England, which now seemed so infinitely far away.
There are hours in life when everything but one central, concrete point of fear, suspense, or pain, disappears into nothingness. As a rule this state of mind lasts but a little while. If it goes on too long it kills the human being experiencing it, or breaks down the frail barriers between sanity and insanity.
As she lay in bed all through the afternoon which followed her walk with Beppo Polda, Lily Fairfield felt as if she were going mad. She asked herself, indeed, if the awful thoughts and suspicions which crowded her brain were not, in very truth, a proof that her brain had given way, and caused her to become suddenly insane.
Horrible images haunted her mind. She thought of La Solitude, that sinister, lonely house, as being full of the ghosts of those who there had met with a hideous death.
Deep in her heart she knew that the Countess Polda had used her as a catspaw, and once she heard herself say quite out loud: “Aunt Cosy killed George Ponting, and she killed Mr. Vissering, and each time I helped!”
Her thoughts took another turn. What ought she to do? Was it her duty to betray Beppo’s father and mother? Nothing could bring George Ponting or the old Dutchman back to life. On the other hand, how prevent the Count and Countess having new victims?
There floated hazily through her mind a memory—a memory of having been told a strange and frightening story of how a woman who was suspected of having committed two murders was stopped, when on the eve of a third crime, by receiving an anonymous letter, warning her that if she ever committed a third murder she would be arrested. Could she, Lily, do something of the kind with regard to Aunt Cosy?
At last, most mercifully, everything about her became shadowy, indistinct, and she fell asleep.
“Would you like to come down to supper, Miss Fairfield?”
She turned on the electric light—a bright, good light, very unlike the guttering candles of La Solitude.