Says I, “I don’t want to look at no Prince,” says I, “I had ruther see a free born American citizen, than all the foreign Princes you can bring out.” Says I, “Americans make perfect fools of themselves in my mind, a runnin’ after a parcel of boys, whose only merit is, they happened to be born before thier brothers and sisters was.” Says I, “If a baby is born in a meetin’ house, it don’t make out that he is born a preacher. A good smart American boy like Thomas Jefferson, looks as good to me as any of your Princes.” I said this in a noble, lofty tone, but after a minute’s thought I went on,
“Though, if you have got a quantity of Princes here, I had as lives see one of Victory’s boys, as any of ’em. The widder Albert is a good housekeeper, and a first-rate calculator, and a woman that has got a Right. I set a good deal of store by the widder Albert, I always thought I should like to get acquainted with her, and visit back and forth, and neighbor with her.”
I waited a minute, but he didn’t make no move towards showin’ me any Prince. But, says he,
“What kind of calico do you want to look at?”
I thought he come off awful sudden from Princes to calico, but I didn’t say nothin’. But I told him “I would like to look at a chocklate colored ground work, with a set flower on it.”
“Shan’t I show you a Dolly Varden,” says he.
I see plainly that he was a tryin’ to impose on me, talkin’ about Princes and Dolly Varden, and says I with dignity,
“If I want to make Miss Varden’s acquaintance, I can, without askin’ you to introduce me. But,” I continued coldly, “I don’t care about gettin’ acquainted with Miss Varden, I have heard her name talked over too much in the street. I am afraid she haint a likely girl. I am afraid she haint such a girl as I should want my Tirzah Ann to associate with. Ever sense I started from Jonesville I have heard that girl talked about. ‘There is Dolly Varden!’ and ‘Oh look at Dolly Varden!’ I have heard it I bet more’n a hundred times sense I sot out. And it seems to me that no modest girl would be traipsin’ all over the country alone, for I never have heard a word about old Mr. and Miss Varden, or any of the Varden boys. Not that it is anything out of charicter to go off on a tower. I am off on a tower myself,” says I, with quite a good deal of dignity, “but it don’t look well for a young girl like her, to be streamin’ round alone. I wish I could see old Mr. and Miss Varden, I would advise the old man and woman to keep Dolly at home, if they have any regard for her good name. Though I’m afraid,” I repeated, lookin’ at him keenly over my specs, “I’m afraid it is too late for me to interfere, I am afraid she haint a likely girl.”
His face was jest as red as blood. But he tried to turn it off with a laugh. And he said somethin’ about her “bein’ the style,” and “bein’ gay,” or somethin’. But I jest stopped him pretty quick. Says I, givin’ him a awful searchin’ look,
“I think jest as much of Dolly as I do of her most intimate friends, male or female.”