I went forward alone to see the Head Hunters. And I looked on the brown little folks with a feelin’ of pity. How did I know they had ever had good advice? I felt here wuz a noble chance for a P. A.
So I sez to ’em, “I’ve hearn of your doin’s, and I want to advise you for your good.” They looked at me real stiddy and I went on, “You may think you hain’t so guilty because you only take folkses heads. But for the lands sakes! did you ever stop to think on’t? What can they do without their heads? Of course,” sez I reasonably, “there is a difference in heads. Some folkses heads hain’t got so much sense in ’em as others. I’ve seen ’em myself that I’ve thought a good wooden head would be jest as useful. But they are the best they’ve got, and they’re attached to ’em, and they can’t git along without ’em. And I always thought you might jest as well take their hull bodies whilst you wuz about it. Don’t you see that is so? When it is pinted out to you by a P. A.?”
“I went forward to see the Head Hunters. I sez to ’em ‘I’ve hearn of your doin’s and I want to advise you for your good.’” (See page 281)
They kinder jabbered over sunthin’ to themselves, and I sez as I turned away, “Now, don’t let me hear of any more such doin’s! Be contented with the heads you’ve got, and don’t try to git somebody elses that don’t belong to you.” Sez I, “Sunthin’ like that, namely stealin’ the interior of folkses heads, has been done time and agin among more civilized folks, and it don’t work; they git found out.”
I left ’em getisculatin’ and jabberin’ in that strange lingo and am in hopes they wuz promisin’ to quit their Head Huntin’, but can’t tell for certain.
As I santered along a female asked me if I had seen the Divin’ Girls, sez she, “There is a immense pond of water, and they are the best divers and swimmers in the world.”