I looked stiddy at him and sez I, “Josiah Allen, will that poor widder git that fifty cents?”
He answered evasive, and I went on, “It is easy to make the excuse that the money you are asked for in charity will do so much more good somewhere else, but,” sez I sternly, “the money don’t git there, and you know it.” He still kep’ his hand in his pocket round that pocket book I believe, whilst he took a new tact: “The air, Samantha, in that room will be stiflin’, and if I should take you into that place and you should stifle, I should die away myself, I couldn’t live a minute without you, dear Samantha,” sez he.
Well, my tizik wuz pretty bad in crowded places and suffice it to say, that though his arguments didn’t convince me, they sort o’ overpowered me for the time bein’, and we stayed in our own room.
Now to show the facility with which folks will turn right round and revolve, I will tell 115 how Josiah seemin’ly forgot mawlstroms, bad air, rumatiz, ages, meetin’ housen, principles, etc., and turned right round on the pivot of his inclination. A day or two after he heard down in the office about the dancin’ parties they had in the parlor anon or oftener, and he come up into our room enthused with the idee and wanted to branch out and go that night, and I sez:
“What about mawlstroms and gayety, Josiah Allen?”
“Oh,” he sez, “I shall be there to protect you, Samantha, no mawlstrom can draw you in and destroy you, whilst I have a drop of blood left in my veins! I’ll protect you here, and I’d protect you at Coney Island,” sez he—(that idee never left his mind I believe).
“What about the bad air?” sez I.
“Oh the winder will probable be open, and you can take your turkey feather fan with you.” And then I dropped my half jocular tone and sez in deadly earnest:
“Be I leanin’ on a Methodist pillow or be I not? Have I a deacon by my side or haven’t I?”
But Josiah seemed calm and even gay sperited under my two reproachful orbs that poured their search lights into his very soul, and he sez: 116