I VISIT THE MOON, THE WITCHIN’ WAVES, OPEN AIR CIRCUS, ADVISE THE MONKEYS, MAKE THE MALE STATUTE LAUGH, BUT DO NOT FIND JOSIAH
The Witching Waves is a track that moves up and down in waves. Scientific folks say that it is a mechanical wonder. I couldn’t see how it wuz done. I couldn’t make one to save my life. Folks git into little automobiles and steer ’em themselves and first they know some unseen power under ’em lifts the track right up, and of course their car goes too with it. Then anon the track will go way down, and they with it, mebby meetin’ another car down there, and they will be all mixed up, but first they know the track will hist up agin under ’em and they have to foller it up agin. Dretful curious spot, well called Witching Waves. But every owner of an auto sees curious times, and feels witchin’ waves, yes indeed!
Why, I hearn about a little girl who happened 236 to hear a man swearin’ dretfully at sunthin and he apoligized.
“Oh,” sez she, “I’m used to it, my papa owns a car.” But ’tain’t necessary to swear at ’em, it don’t do no good, besides the wickedness on’t.
The Witching Waves “Folks get into little automobiles and steer ’em themselves.” (See page 235)
But jest as I wuz moralizin’ on this, I hearn a bystander talkin’ about the Trip to the Moon. And rememberin’ what Bildad said I sot out for the air-ship that took folks there. To tell the truth, I’d always hankered to see what wuz on the moon. Not to see that old man of the moon 237 (no, Josiah wuz my choice); but I always did want to know what wuz on the other planets, and though I’m most ashamed to say it, after all my talk agin Coney Island, yet if it hadn’t been for the kankerin’ worm of anxiety knawin’ at my vitals, I should have enjoyed myself first rate as the air-ship sailed off, with a stately motion, for the moon.
I had watched the passengers with a eagle vision but no Josiah embarked, but the air-ship sailed off, the earth receeded, we wuz in the clouds, anon we passed through a big thunder storm, I wuz almost lost in thought watchin’ sea and ocean when the captain called out:
“The Moon! the Moon!”