"What if wimmen did dedicate it? They can git up dressed in their silks and shiffoniers, and talk, talk, but they can't vote no matter how well off they be. They've got to pony up and pay taxes and toe the mark in law jest as men tell 'em to."
"Why," sez he, warmin' with his subject, "we men can set on you in juries and you can't help yourselves, and hang you and so forth. And you W.C.T.U. wimmen would have to let your tax money go to pay for drinkin' shacks if we men of Jonesville, and the world, took it into our heads to make you. Why," sez he, lookin' more and more big feelin' as he went on, as why shouldn't he, as he recounted men's glorious advantages,
"Nate Flanders, who is most a fool, can vote and make you knuckle down and do as he tells you to. And don't you remember that time the 'lection run so clost they got up old bed-ridden Nate Haskins, whose brain had been softenin' for years, and his wife had to dress him and git him ready for the pole, he callin' on his wife, Nancy, to put on every identical garment and tell where it went, and when they got him to the pole he wouldn't vote because Nance wuzn't there to tell him which ticket to vote. She'd jest kep' that voter alive for years, and been head and hands for him, but she couldn't vote and he could."
Everybody has seen hosses run off the track when they wuz goin' too fast; Josiah wuz so engaged in runnin' wimmen's pride down, he didn't realize where he wuz gallopin' to. "And there wuz Jane Ellis who lost her husband and two boys through drinkin', she had to let her tax money be used to help nominate a license man, who opened a liquor saloon right under her nose, and the last boy she had took to drinkin' and killed himself last week drunk as a fool."
"I'd be ashamed to boast of that, Josiah Allen, I'd be ashamed on't."
"Well," sez he, lookin' kinder meachin', "I didn't say I approved of that, I only said it to prove how weak and triflin' a thing woman really is in the eyes of the law." And the rubber-like self-esteem of a male, havin' sprung back in full force, he went on:
"Why, Miss Corkins, up to Zoar, that pays bigger taxes than any man in town, earnt it all herself too in the millionary bizness, why, that snub-nosed nigger that drives for her can vote, and she can't. And then I'd talk about dedicatin' the biggest buildin' in the world, singin' hims on the biggest organ and lettin' a few men into the back door—I wouldn't feel so big about it if I wuz you.
"Why, we men jest throw such little compliments in the way of females to keep you contented, jest as I throw crumbs from the table to Bruno to home and pat him on the back. He knows he can't come to the table. We men jest hang onto the ballot; wimmen hain't goin' to git holt of that in a hurry and boss us round, no indeed!"
Oh, how obstrepolous and important he did talk and act! And Blandina lookin' up so admirin' at him and agreein' to every word he said, jest for all the world like an anty, seemed to rile me worse than anything else. But as long as I couldn't dispute a word he said, knowin' it wuz as true as gospel, I kep' demute, and hoped he would take it for a dignified silence that wouldn't dain to argy.
Well, we had our lunch in a box and a bottle of cold tea, and we eat it, and rested quite a spell, Josiah's good nater returnin' with every mouthful he took, till by the time we got ready to start out agin, he wuz as clever a critter as I want to see.