One of the great mistakes of the mistress is that she lets the state of affairs greatly disturb her. Why should she? The maid is not “her own kind,” and the woman is wrong who judges the uneducated, ill-reared hireling by the rules that govern the better-educated classes. The servant and the employer have been reared in different worlds, and to ignore this fact is folly. How often do we see the mistress “hurt” because of Norah’s lack of consideration for her and her time, and vexed because the servant fails to appreciate any kindness shown her? Let her accept the condition of affairs as what the slangy boy would call “part of the game,” and not waste God-given nerve and energy in worrying over it. If she gets reasonably good return in work for the wages she pays, she should be content.
If a woman’s maid does something wrong or omits a duty, however important, if guests are present the mistake should be remedied as quietly as possible and without reproof. To rebuke a servant before others is a great unkindness to her and needlessly embarrasses the visitor.
EXPECT THE BEST
ALWAYS BE CONSIDERATE
The mistress should not expect a friend and counselor in the maid. Once in a while, one meets a servant who, by some accident, is capable of discerning the refinement of nature in her employer, and of respecting it. In this case, she will care more for the employer for knowing that she is trusted. It is a fact that, by appealing to the best in human nature—be that nature American, Irish, German or Scandinavian—we elicit the best from our fellow creatures. Let the mistress, then, try to believe in the good intentions of her servant, or, if she can not really believe in them, let her attempt to do so. Her attitude of mind will, unconsciously to herself, make itself felt upon her helper. Let her take it for granted that the “new girl” means to stay, is honest, trustworthy and anxious to please, and let her talk to her as if all these things were foregone conclusions. She may show by gentle manner and kindly consideration that Norah or Gretchen is a sister-woman, not a machine. If a washing or ironing happens to be heavy, let her suggest a simple dessert of fruit, instead of the pudding that had been planned. And if the maid’s heavy eyes and forced smile show that she is not well, let the mistress, for a brief moment, put herself in the place of the hireling, and think what she would want done for her under similar circumstances. She will then suggest that some of the work that can be deferred be laid aside until the following day, or offer to give a hand in making the beds or dusting the rooms.
“But,” declares the systematic housewife, “I do not hire a servant,—and then do my housework!”
No! Neither did you hire your maid-of-all-work to be a sick nurse,—but were you ill it would be she who would cook your meals, carry up your tray and take care of you, unless you were so ill as to need the services of a trained attendant. Bear this in mind, and show the maid that you do bear it in mind.
WORK AFTER HOURS