Much of the success of a dinner depends upon the serving. A well-trained maid or man is indispensable, and it is not to be denied that the training, for this purpose, of the average servant to be found in the West is difficult. But with patience it can be done. If one is in the habit, as one should be, of insisting that the home dinner be served with proper formality, the extra duties involved in the service of a larger number of people and of a greater range of dishes need not be viewed with terror.
If there are ten or twelve guests the services of two maids or men become necessary, lest the portions on the plates become cold before the sauces and vegetables that are to accompany them can be passed. For elaborate dinners the rule is one waiter to every three guests.
In punctilious households the unwritten law that a guest should never be without a plate before him is observed, and this is known as the service or place plate. At an informal meal this plate may be dispensed with.
A maid should be taught to move quietly, to keep her eyes and thoughts on what she is doing, and in an emergency to go directly to her mistress for a quiet word of instruction. It is particularly important that the domestic in the kitchen should also be as quiet as possible in her movements. Nothing is more annoying during a dinner conversation than a crash of crockery in the culinary regions.
THE HOUR FOR DINNER
As a rule dinner is served in most American cities at seven o’clock. In New York, however, where long distance makes it difficult for men to reach home, dress for the evening and arrive at any stated place, eight o’clock is frequently the hour.
SAYING GRACE
In not a few houses the fine old fashion of saying grace is still observed and the guest should carefully watch his hostess for a cue as to how to conduct himself. A young woman who happened to be visiting in one of the older New England families chanced to take her first meal at the dinner hour. After a moment’s pause she was asked by her hostess to start the meal, and with best intentions she did so by passing a bread plate near her. To her dismay she afterward learned that she had been expected to say grace. Of course, such an incident could occur only at an informal dinner, but it serves to bring up the point that many a hostess embarrasses a guest by directly asking him to perform this service which a natural timidity or his being unaccustomed to it may make an ordeal for him. If a clergyman is present, respect to his position, whatever one’s own religious convictions or want of them, demands that he be asked to say grace.