Plant. Well, well, let us hope he won't be so far removed in the future. I regret very deeply that we have never yet enjoyed the friendship of—er—dear cousin Jack.
Pearl. You have frequently remarked, it was not worth while to cultivate any of our poor relations.
Plant. (hotly) Do you want your pocket money stopped? The fact is. Pearl. you're bringing my grey hairs——(stroking his black locks)
Pearl. (quietly) Your what?
Plant. (jumping up) I stop your pocket money for a month! Ooh! (puts his hand to his back) This lumbago is unbearable. When a man gets to my time of life——
Pearl. (quietly) What time is it now?
Plant. (hotly) I stop your pocket money for three months!
Pearl. (rises) Really, father, a solicitor should be more cautious. I meant to say the time is getting on, (points to clock and crosses to couch—stands behind Ruby) and you have not yet informed us of the "very solemn" something you have to say.
Plant. I accept your explanation—without prejudice. (stands R. of couch) I say when a man gets to my time of life—the future happiness of his offspring becomes an all-engrossing theme. You are aware that when exalted personages contemplate a matrimonial alliance, they neyer look outside the family. Living as we do, in so fashionable a resort as Southsea, we cannot be too —er—"tony" in such important matters. Now you are both—as I know, being your father—heart-free.
(Pearl digs Ruby hard in the ribs.)