(Bell rings.)
Aurora. (leaving go of Aunt) Drat that bell, it's spoilt my day.
(Exit Aurora.)
Doctor. (quietly) Look here, you merry Andrews take your hair off. (pulls it) Oh, by George!, he has stuck it on tight! (pulls it harder)
Aunt. (indignantly) Sir!
Doctor. Don't put on that silly voice, I know all about you. I'll make him jealous, (sings) "There were two jolly sailor girls from Portsmouth town"—the little one makes eyes at me. But it's the tall one I like, she calls me "dear Jack." Oh, she's dead gone on me. Her father wants me to marry her. (aside) That's shut him up! (aloud) And look here, you've got to take your hook. I'm fagged out after my railway journey—I'm going to have a bath before she comes—you know I'm a great believer in the water cure.
(Takes off his frock coat and throws it down, goes to bath room, turns on hot and cold taps in sight of audience, noise of water flowing into bath.)
Now, don't sit there looking a silly ass. (shies something at her at the last word)
(Aunt sits facing audience, speechless with indignation.)
You know you're not a bit like a lady, and nobody but a lunatic would take you for one. Hurry up and get some decent togs on, and come back for me at 7:30. Do you hear, you old joker, it's no use keeping it up—