A coachman, extolling the sagacity of one of his horses, observed, that "if anybody was to go for to use him ill, he would bear malice like a Christian."
XXXII.—ONE GOOD TURN DESERVES ANOTHER.
Dr. A., physician at Newcastle, being summoned to a vestry, in order to reprimand the sexton for drunkenness, he dwelt so long on the sexton's misconduct, as to draw from him this expression: "Sir, I thought you would have been the last man alive to appear against me, as I have covered so many blunders of yours!"
XXXIII.—A NOVEL COMPLAINT.
A rich man sent to call a physician for a slight disorder. The physician felt his pulse, and said, "Do you eat well?"—"Yes," said the patient. "Do you sleep well?"—"I do."—"Then," said the physician, "I shall give you something to take away all that!"
XXXIV.—A CONJUGAL CAUTION.
Sir George Etherege, having run up a score at Lockit's, absented himself from the ordinary. In consequence of this, Mrs. Lockit was sent to dun him and threaten him with an action. He told the messenger that he would certainly kiss her if she stirred a step in it! On this, the message being brought, she called for her hood and scarf, and told her husband, who interposed, "that she should see if there was any fellow alive that had the impudence!"—"Pr'ythee, my dear, don't be so rash," replied the good man; "you don't know what a man may do in a passion."
XXXV.—A PORTRAIT CAPITALLY EXECUTED.
In a bookseller's catalogue lately appeared the following article: "Memoirs of Charles the First,—with, a head capitally executed."