A loquacious lady, ill of a complaint of forty years' standing, applied to Mr. Abernethy for advice, and had begun to describe its progress from the first, when Mr. A. interrupted her, saying he wanted to go into the next street, to see a patient; he begged the lady to inform him how long it would take her to tell her story. The answer was, twenty minutes. He asked her to proceed, and hoped she would endeavor to finish by the time he returned.
DCCXXXIX.—EUCLID REFUTED.
(A part is not equal to the whole.—Axiom.)
This is a vulgar error, as I'll prove,
Or freely forfeit half a pipe of sherry;
'Tis plain one sixteenth part of Brougham's sense,
Equals the whole possessed by L—d—d—y.
DCCXL.—BRED ON THE BOARDS.
When Morris had the Haymarket Theatre, Jerrold, on a certain occasion, had reason to find fault with the strength, or rather, the want of strength, of the company. Morris expostulated, and said, "Why there's V——, he was bred on these boards!"—"He looks as though he'd been cut out of them," replied Jerrold.
DCCXLI.—ON THE DULNESS OF A DEBATE IN THE HOUSE OF COMMONS.
No wonder the debate fell dead
'Neath such a constant fire of lead.
DCCXLII.—PAINTING.
A nobleman who was a great amateur painter showed one of his performances to Turner. That great artist said to him, "My lord, you want nothing but poverty to become a very excellent painter."