"If an earthquake were to engulf England to-morrow," said Jerrold, "the English would manage to meet and dine somewhere among the rubbish, just to celebrate the event."
DCCCVI.—EPIGRAM.
When by a jury one is tried,
Twelve of his equals are implied;
Then W—— might attempt in vain,
This sacred privilege to obtain.
Since human nature ne'er on earth
Gave to twelve equal scoundrels birth.
DCCCVII.—REFORMATION.
Judge Burnet, son of the famous Bishop of Salisbury, when young, is said to have been of a wild and dissipated turn. Being one day found by the Bishop in a very serious humor, "What is the matter with you, Tom?" said he, "what are you ruminating on?"—"A greater work than your lordship's History of the Reformation," answered the son. "Ay! what is that?" said the Bishop. "The reformation of myself, my lord," answered the son.
DCCCVIII.—THE JEST OF ANCESTRY.
Lord Chesterfield placed among the portraits of his ancestors two old heads, inscribed Adam de Stanhope, and Eve de Stanhope: the ridicule is admirable.
Old Peter Leneve, the herald, who thought ridicule consisted in not being of an old family, made this epitaph for young Craggs, whose father had been a footman: Here lies the last who died before the first of his family! Old Craggs was one day getting into a coach with Arthur Moore, who had worn a livery too, when he turned about, and said, "Why, Arthur, I am always going to get up behind; are not you?"
The Gordons trace their name no farther back than the days of Alexander the Great, from Gordonia, a city of Macedon, which, they say, once formed part of Alexander's dominions, and, from thence, no doubt, the clan must have come!