MDCXL.—A YOKSHIRE BULL.
A Yorkshire clergyman, preaching for the Blind Asylum, began by gravely remarking: "If all the world were blind, what a melancholy sight it would be!"
MDCXLI.—A ONE-SIDED JOKE.
A lady requested her husband's permission to wear rouge. "I can give you permission, my dear," he replied, "only for one cheek."
MDCXLII.—TWO CURES FOR AGUE.
Bishop Blomfield, when presiding over the diocese of London, had occasion to call the attention of the Essex incumbents to the necessity of residing in their parishes; and he reminded them that curates were, after all, of the same flesh and blood as rectors, and that the residence which was possible for the one, could not be quite impossible for the other. "Besides," added he, "there are two well-known preservatives against ague; the one is, a good deal of care and a little port wine; the other, a little care and a good deal of port wine. I prefer the former; but if any of the clergy prefer the latter, it is at all events a remedy which incumbents can afford better than curates."
MDCXLIII.—A QUESTION OF DESCENT.
A Yorkshire nobleman, who was fond of boasting of his Norman descent, said to one of his tenants, whom he thought was not addressing him with proper respect: "Do you know, fellow, that my ancestors came over with William the Conqueror?"—"And, perhaps," retorted the sturdy Saxon, "they found mine here when they comed."
MDCXLIV.—PLEASANT FOR A FATHER.
A laird's eldest son was rather a simpleton. Laird says, "I am going to send the young laird abroad."—"What for?" asks the tenant. Laird answered, "To see the world." Tenant replied, "But lordsake, laird, will no the world see him?"