CCLXIII.—DUPLEX MOVEMENT.
A worthy alderman, captain of a volunteer corps, was ordering his company to fall back, in order to dress with the line, and gave the word, "Advance three paces back-wards! march!"
CCLXIV.—COULEUR DE ROSE.
An officer in full regimentals, apprehensive lest he should come in contact with a chimney-sweep that was pressing towards him, exclaimed, "Keep off, you black rascal."—"You were as black as me before you were boiled," cried sooty.
CCLXV.—A FEELING WITNESS.
A lawyer, upon a circuit in Ireland, who was pleading the cause of an infant plaintiff, took the child up in his arms, and presented it to the jury, suffused with tears. This had a great effect, until the opposite lawyer asked the child, "What made him cry?"—"He pinched me!" answered the little innocent. The whole court was convulsed with laughter.
CCLXVI.—EXTREMES MEET.
An Irish gardener seeing a boy stealing some fruit, swore, if he caught him there again, he'd lock him up in the ice-house and warm his jacket.
CCLXVII.—DR. WEATHER-EYE.
An Irish gentleman was relating in company that he saw a terrible wind the other night. "Saw a wind!" said another, "I never heard of a wind being seen. But, pray, what was it like!"—"Like to have blown my house about my ears," replied the first.