"Madam president, I guess," he said, gravely. "Go on, sissy."
'Tilda Jane went on, still with her eye on the clock, and still speaking feverishly. "The mam pressiding staked me out. Says she, 'Here is a little girl—she come to us like a lily o' the field; no dress on, no bunnit, no nothin'. We've fed an' clothed the lily, an' guv her good advice, an' she's lifted up her heel agin us. She deifies us, she introjuces toads an' snakes into the sacred presings of our sinningcherry for orphans. She packs a dirty dog in bed. We'll never levelate her. She's lowering the key of our 'stution. She knows not the place of reptiles an' quadruples. Ladies, shall we keep this little disturving lellement in our 'stution? If thy hand 'fend against thee cut it off. If thy foot straggle, treat it likewise.'
"Then she set down, an' another lady got up. Says she, 'I'm always for mercy—strained mercy dropping like juice from heaven. If this little girl is turned inside out, she'll be a bright an' shinin' light. I prepose that we make the 'speriment. The tastes is in her, but we can nip off the grati'cations. I remove that instead of disturving her, we disturve the animiles. Ladies, we has hard work to run this 'stution.'"
"This 'stution?" said the young man.
"Yes, 'stution," repeated 'Tilda Jane, "that's what they call the 'sylum. Well, this lady went on an' says she, 'Let's send away the cats an' dogs an' all the children's pets—squirrels an' pigeons an' rabbits, 'cause this little girl's disruptin' every child on the place. Once when cats come an' other animiles, they was stoned away. Now they're took in. I come across one little feller jus' now, an' instead o' learnin' his lesson he was playin' with a beetle. Ticklin' it with a straw, ladies. Now ain't that awful? We've got 'sponsibilities toward these foun'lings. I feels like a mother. If we sends 'em foolish out in the world we'll be blamed. Our faithful matron says it's unpossible to ketch rats an' mice. This little girl gets at the traps, an' let's 'em go. She's a born rule-smasher!'
"Then she closed her mouth an' set down, an' the big lady sittin' at the head o' the table pounded her hammer 'cause they all fell to jabberin'. Says she, 'Will some lady make a commotion?' Then one lady got up, an' she says, 'I remove that all animiles be decharged from this 'stution.'
"'What about the chickings?' called out another lady. 'You must declude them. This will go on record.' The other lady said, ''Scuse me, I forgot the chickings. I'll mend my dissolution. I remove that all quadruples be decharged from this 'stution.'
"That suited some, an' didn't suit t'others, an' there was a kind of chally-vally. One lady said she's mend the mendment, an' then the mam pressiding got kind o' mixy-maxy, an' said they'd better start all over agin, 'cause she'd lose her way 'mong so many mendments. After a long time, they got their ideas sot, an' they said that I was to stay, but all the animiles was to go. I didn't snuffle nor nothin', but I just said, 'Are you plannin' to kill that there dog?'
"The mam pressiding gave a squeal an' said, 'No, that would be cruel. They would give the dog to some little feller who would be good to him.' I said, 'Little fellers tie tin cans to dogs' tails'—an' then they got mad with me an' said I was trespicious. Then I said, 'All right,' 'cause what could I do agin a whole lot o' lady-boards? But I made up my mind I'd have to work my way out of it, 'cause it would kill that little dog to be took from me. So I run away."