Suppose a mental case to be on trial, as cases are tried
430:18 in court. A man is charged with having committed liver-
complaint. The patient feels ill, ruminates,
and the trial commences. Personal Sense is
430:21 the plaintiff. Mortal Man is the defendant. False Belief
is the attorney for Personal Sense. Mortal Minds, Ma-
teria Medica, Anatomy, Physiology, Hypnotism, Envy,
430:24 Greed and Ingratitude, constitute the jury. The court-
room is filled with interested spectators, and Judge
Medicine is on the bench.
430:27 The evidence for the prosecution being called for, a
witness testifies thus: -
I represent Health-laws. I was present on certain nights
430:30 when the prisoner, or patient, watched with a sick friend.
Although I have the superintendence of human affairs, I
was personally abused on those occasions. I was told that
431:1 I must remain silent until called for at this trial, when I
would be allowed to testify in the case. Notwithstanding
431:3 my rules to the contrary, the prisoner watched with the sick
every night in the week. When the sick mortal was thirsty,
the prisoner gave him drink. During all this time the pris-
431:6 oner attended to his daily labors, partaking of food at ir-
regular intervals, sometimes going to sleep immediately
after a heavy meal. At last he committed liver-complaint,
431:9 which I considered criminal, inasmuch as this offence is
deemed punishable with death. Therefore I arrested Mor-
tal Man in behalf of the state (namely, the body) and cast
431:12 him into prison.
At the time of the arrest the prisoner summoned Physi-
ology, Materia Medica, and Hypnotism to prevent his pun-
431:15 ishment. The struggle on their part was long. Materia
Medica held out the longest, but at length all these assist-
ants resigned to me, Health-laws, and I succeeded in get-
431:18 ting Mortal Man into close confinement until I should
release him.
The next witness is called:-
431:21 I am Coated Tongue. I am covered with a foul fur,
placed on me the night of the liver-attack. Morbid Secre-
tion hypnotized the prisoner and took control of his mind,
431:24 making him despondent.
Another witness takes the stand and testifies:-
I am Sallow Skin. I have been dry, hot, and chilled by
431:27 turns since the night of the liver-attack. I have lost my
healthy hue and become unsightly, although nothing on my
part has occasioned this change. I practise daily ablutions
431:30 and perform my functions as usual, but I am robbed of my
good looks.
432:1 The next witness testifies: -
I am Nerve, the State Commissioner for Mortal Man.
432:3 I am intimately acquainted with the plaintiff, Personal
Sense, and know him to be truthful and upright, whereas
Mortal Man, the prisoner at the bar, is capable of false-
432:6 hood. I was witness to the crime of liver-complaint. I
knew the prisoner would commit it, for I convey messages
from my residence in matter, alias brain, to body.
432:9 Another witness is called for by the Court of Error
and says: -