It is, however, quite surprising to see the rough way in which some people allow themselves to be served, and the muddle in which they prefer to live rather than do anything themselves that they consider menial; as if an untidy house, slovenly servants, badly cooked and coarsely served food, are not likely to do much more to lower their self-respect than any amount of so-called drudgery. ‘A gentlewoman,’ it has been said, ‘never lowers herself by doing that which would make her feel less a gentlewoman if left undone.’
How much healthier and happier, too, many girls would be, if, instead of going out in all weathers, day after day, to earn a miserable pittance in any such employment as daily governesses, they would do some of the lighter housework, cooking, &c., at home. By being able to do with one servant instead of two, they would save probably more than they could earn in other ways, besides being much stronger from the exercise thus taken. But too many girls are, unfortunately, imbued with the vulgar notion that work is not genteel. What a Moloch this gentility has been and still is! What a number of human sacrifices are continually placed at its shrine, and what puppets its votaries become! Mr. Smiles says: ‘There is a dreadful ambition abroad for being “genteel.” We keep up appearances too often at the expense of honesty, and though we may not be rich, yet we must seem to be so. We must be “respectable,” though only in the meanest sense—in mere vulgar outward show. We have not the courage to go patiently onward in the condition of life in which it has pleased God to call us, but must needs live in some fashionable state to which we ridiculously please to call ourselves; and all to gratify the vanity of that unsubstantial genteel world of which we form a part.’
It would effect a moral revolution if women would only look at matters in the true light. How much crime and misery may be traced to mismanaged unattractive homes! How many deaths to the ignorance of hygiene! How much intemperance to the physical depression caused by badly cooked food! Let us hope that the refinement, falsely so called, which is only another name for vanity, laziness, and selfishness, may soon give way to the true refinement of heart and mind which considers nothing too menial which will benefit others; nothing too common that will add to the happiness of our fellow-creatures.
If we women could earnestly and courageously endeavour to do the duty nearest to us, remembering that all honest work, of whatever kind, has been for ever ennobled by the great Founder of our Faith, so should we be, one in one way and one in another, ‘helping to move (to quote Dean Goulburn) the wheels of the great world system whose revolutions are bringing on the kingdom of Christ.’ ‘To be good and to be useful,’ as Canon Kingsley says, ‘are the two objects for which we were sent into this world.’
[HINTS TO YOUNG HOUSEKEEPERS.]
She looketh well to the ways of her household.
Proverbs of Solomon.
Take care that you know definitely what sum you can afford to spend on your household expenses, and make it a point of conscience never to exceed it. Market with ready money, if possible; but, if it is more convenient to pay by the month, or quarter, never make that an excuse for letting your bills mount up to double what you can afford to pay. With accounts, carefully kept, it is quite possible to regulate the expenditure to the income.
Never order things at random, but inquire the price of everything before purchasing. Take every pains to know how to judge of the quality of meat, groceries, &c., so that you may not be imposed on. Never be ashamed to say you cannot afford to have this or that. To be poor may be a misfortune, but it is not a fault; and, indeed, to be rich is often a far greater misfortune. The discipline of poverty, and the self-denial it involves, will often strengthen a character which the luxury of riches would enervate.