Miss Ellis continues, apparently partly in her own words:—
With this idea, then, that we largely fashion our own lives, that, "working with God, and for him, our lives can know no true failure, but all things shall contribute to our soul's true success," let us take up our cross, and then we shall find
"The burden light,
The path made straight, the way all bright,
Our warfare cease;
So shall we win the crown,
At last our life lay down
In perfect peace."
Two pages more on the same topic, of original and selected matter skilfully blended (perhaps the whole a bit of one of the sermons never to be preached), end with the hymn, copied in full,—
"I ask not wealth, but power to take
And use the things I have aright;"
and Miss Ellis finally sums all up, "True submission, then, consists in working out our own salvation, looking to God for strength wherewith to work." The only entry for the next day is part of the hymn,—
"But God, through ways they have not known,
Will lead his own."
November 11 she returned home.
November 14. Attended fair, and met many friends. Mr. Wendte kindly set me to work at a Book and Tract Table, and I sold two books and distributed a quantity of free matter.
December 5. Am thoroughly on the road to the Book and Tract Table in the church. Hope it may prove a good thing, and that I shall do it faithfully.
December 12. Have been miserable all the week, and quite sick two and a half hours Thursday. Couldn't raise my head, and had to pretty much give up all day. Had sociable this week, and I was on hand to urge the book trade, and hoped to have a supply to-day, but was disappointed in it. It was one of the unsatisfactory days to me, for I have had such a tremendous noise in my head that I couldn't hear at all.
December 19. Held a meeting at Mrs. ——'s on Friday, with regard to the Woman's Auxiliary Missionary work. It has been decided that I am to take charge of distribution of Liberal publications, also to canvass for the "Register." Had Mr. Mayo to preach for us to-day. I was astonished to hear how well I heard him, and how natural it seemed. It made my cross all the heavier in contrast. [The sonnet, "Strength for the Day," by Rachel G. Alsop, is copied to close this day's record.]
Feb. 10, 1881. Began committing "A Statement of Unitarian Belief in Bible Language."
February 13. I have felt rather depressed this week, and needed the church to-day, which did do me good, as I heard more of the sermon than I have heard for thirteen years.
February 20. Sermon to-day on "Are ye good Hearers?" I think my remark to Mr. Wendte last Sunday must have called it forth.... Mr. Wendte made the following beautiful tribute to the deaf.... I heard just enough to overcome me, and thought two or three times that I should break down. Have cried and laughed over the sermon.
A long extract is copied into the journal, of which this is a portion:—
"Blindness only separates a man from Nature, but the loss of hearing also isolates him, more or less, from human companionship. As a natural consequence, the deaf are apt to lose interest in the social life around them, and to grow discontented, suspicious, and morose. You and I know beautiful examples to the contrary,—persons so patient, brave, and uncomplaining amidst their heavy tribulation, so sunny of temper and full of human kindness, that they are a constant inspiration and joy to us. Yet theirs is a hard struggle, to remain true and sweet and Christian with such fearful odds against them in the journey of life."
February 27. Am becoming quite interested in missionary work in Ravenna, Ohio.
"We scatter seeds with careless hand,
And dream we ne'er shall see them more;
But for a thousand years
Their fruit appears,
In weeds that mar the land,
Or healthful store."March 13. To-day is my forty-sixth birthday, and I am about ready, or rather have resolved, to open a Circulating Library in the church, as quite a number are in favor of it. We organized our Women's Auxiliary Conference last Tuesday, of a rainy day: Mrs. Fayette Smith, President; Mrs. Alice Williams Brotherton, Vice-president; Fannie Field, Treasurer and Recording Secretary; Miss Ellis, Corresponding Secretary; Executive Committee (with the above), Mrs. Davies Wilson, Miss Elizabeth D. Allen.