"Such are the partial laws enacted by men; for, only to lay a ſtreſs on the dependent ſtate of a woman in the grand queſtion of the comforts ariſing from the poſſeſſion of property, ſhe is [even in this article] much more injured by the loſs of the huſband's affection, than he by that of his wife; yet where is ſhe, condemned to the ſolitude of a deſerted home, to look for a compenſation from the woman, who ſeduces him from her? She cannot drive an unfaithful huſband from his houſe, nor ſeparate, or tear, his children from him, however culpable he may be; and he, ſtill the maſter of his own fate, enjoys the ſmiles of a world, that would brand her with infamy, did ſhe, ſeeking conſolation, venture to retaliate.
"Theſe remarks are not dictated by experience; but merely by the compaſſion I feel for many amiable women, the out-laws of the world. For myſelf, never encouraging any of the advances that were made to me, my lovers dropped off like the untimely ſhoots of ſpring. I did not even coquet with them; becauſe I found, on examining myſelf, I could not coquet with a man without loving him a little; and I perceived that I ſhould not be able to ſtop at the line of what are termed innocent freedoms, did I ſuffer any. My reſerve was then the conſequence of delicacy. Freedom of conduct has emancipated many women's minds; but my conduct has moſt rigidly been governed by my principles, till the improvement of my underſtanding has enabled me to diſcern the fallacy of prejudices at war with nature and reaſon.
"Shortly after the change I have mentioned in my huſband's conduct, my uncle was compelled by his declining health, to ſeek the ſuccour of a milder climate, and embark for Liſbon. He left his will in the hands of a friend, an eminent ſolicitor; he had previouſly queſtioned me relative to my ſituation and ſtate of mind, and declared very freely, that he could place no reliance on the ſtability of my huſband's profeſſions. He had been deceived in the unfolding of his character; he now thought it fixed in a train of actions that would inevitably lead to ruin and diſgrace.
"The evening before his departure, which we ſpent alone together, he folded me to his heart, uttering the endearing appellation of 'child.'—My more than father! why was I not permitted to perform the laſt duties of one, and ſmooth the pillow of death? He ſeemed by his manner to be convinced that he ſhould never ſee me more; yet requeſted me, moſt earneſtly, to come to him, ſhould I be obliged to leave my huſband. He had before expreſſed his ſorrow at hearing of my pregnancy, having determined to prevail on me to accompany him, till I informed him of that circumſtance. He expreſſed himſelf unfeignedly ſorry that any new tie ſhould bind me to a man whom he thought ſo incapable of eſtimating my value; ſuch was the kind language of affection.
"I muſt repeat his own words; they made an indelible impreſſion on my mind:
"'The marriage ſtate is certainly that in which women, generally ſpeaking, can be moſt uſeful; but I am far from thinking that a woman, once married, ought to conſider the engagement as indiſſoluble (eſpecially if there be no children to reward her for ſacrificing her feelings) in caſe her huſband merits neither her love, nor eſteem. Eſteem will often ſupply the place of love; and prevent a woman from being wretched, though it may not make her happy. The magnitude of a ſacrifice ought always to bear ſome proportion to the utility in view; and for a woman to live with a man, for whom ſhe can cheriſh neither affection nor eſteem, or even be of any uſe to him, excepting in the light of a houſe-keeper, is an abjectneſs of condition, the enduring of which no concurrence of circumſtances can ever make a duty in the ſight of God or juſt men. If indeed ſhe ſubmits to it merely to be maintained in idleneſs, ſhe has no right to complain bitterly of her fate; or to act, as a perſon of independent character might, as if ſhe had a title to diſregard general rules.
"'But the miſfortune is, that many women only ſubmit in appearance, and forfeit their own reſpect to ſecure their reputation in the world. The ſituation of a woman ſeparated from her huſband, is undoubtedly very different from that of a man who has left his wife. He, with lordly dignity, has ſhaken of a clog; and the allowing her food and raiment, is thought ſufficient to ſecure his reputation from taint. And, ſhould ſhe have been inconſiderate, he will be celebrated for his generoſity and forbearance. Such is the reſpect paid to the maſter-key of property! A woman, on the contrary, reſigning what is termed her natural protector (though he never was ſo, but in name) is deſpiſed and ſhunned, for aſſerting the independence of mind diſtinctive of a rational being, and ſpurning at ſlavery.'
"During the remainder of the evening, my uncle's tenderneſs led him frequently to revert to the ſubject, and utter, with increaſing warmth, ſentiments to the ſame purport. At length it was neceſſary to ſay 'Farewell!'—and we parted—gracious God! to meet no more.
