Twentieth Century Culture and Deportment / Or the Lady and Gentleman at Home and Abroad; Containing Rules of Etiquette for All Occasions, Including Calls; Invitations; Parties; Weddings; Receptions; Dinners and Teas; Etiquette of the Street; Public Places, Etc., Etc. Forming a Complete Guide to Self-Culture; the Art of Dressing Well; Conversation; Courtship; Etiquette for Children; Letter-Writing; Artistic Home and Interior Decorations, Etc.

by Maud C. Cooke

Do not take children while making formal visits. They are often an annoyance, and always a check upon conversation. If they must be taken, do not allow them to meddle with anything in the room, nor to interrupt the conversation. Neither should they be permitted to handle the belongings, or finger the attire, of callers at the house. Do not take them to art galleries, artist’s or sculptor’s studios, and never allow them to meddle with goods in stores.

Slang, Profanity, Intemperance.

Slang should be eliminated, as much as possible, from the household vocabulary. Boys should be taught that profanity, or vulgarity in expression, far from being manly, only lowers them in the estimation of all sensible people.

It should also be early impressed upon them that there is danger in the use of liquor in any form, as well as folly in falling into the tobacco habit.

At Table.

Punctuality at the table should be taught first of all. The little table observances so necessary to refinement of manner should be early inculcated. Table manners (see proper department) should be taught at the earliest age that the child is capable of appearing at the table. The proper use of knife, fork, spoon and napkin should be impressed upon their minds from the first, and much after annoyance will be saved.

Teach them to eat quietly without any noise of mastication, swallowing or drinking being audible. Insist upon their sitting still while waiting to be served and not to play with knife, napkin ring or other small articles on the table.

Insist upon their breaking bread, instead of cutting it, and never to pick up one piece of bread or cake from the plate and then exchange it for another.

Teach them to eat fruit properly, to use finger bowls, if such are provided, and to keep their lips closed as much as possible while eating. Teach them to pass a pitcher with the handle toward the one served, and not to eat with one hand and pass some article with the other.

See that they do not eat too fast—both health and appearances being considered in this item—and that they do not talk with their mouths full. Teach them to turn away their heads and cover their mouth with their hand, if obliged to cough, sneeze or yawn at table, and, as soon as possible, require them to suppress these exhibitions. Never let them pick their teeth at the table, or lounge upon it with their elbows while eating.