"Just whatever comes into my head. Married women understand these sort of things. I shall know what to say—at the time."
"So will he. And then——"
"There you go!" Tears threatened again and her voice shook. "You talk about loving me and you don't trust me any more than Theo does. If I mayn't do this my own way I won't take the money at all."
"Don't talk nonsense, child," Honor cried desperately, her own self-control almost at an end. "You must take it. And if you insist on running risks with your eyes open, there's no more to be said except make haste and get the wretched thing done with. Go at once, in your jhampan—and don't leave it. Ask for Miss Kresney; and—shop or no shop—mind you get a proper receipt. Then come straight home and tell Theo you will do what he wishes. He will have had time to think things over and it will be all right. I know it will. Perhaps you would like me to speak of it to him, if I get the chance?"
"Yes—yes. Do, please! You dear, wonderful Honor! I don't know how to say thank you enough——"
But Honor disengaged herself something hurriedly. The ache of rebellion at her heart made Evelyn's effusiveness unendurable.
"Don't thank me at all," she said. "I don't want your thanks. I don't—deserve them. Take care of that envelope; it is worth more than two hundred rupees to you—and to me. Now go!"
And taking her by the shoulders, she put her gently outside the door. Then, drawing a deep breath of relief, stood alone with the realisation of all that had passed.
It seemed that she was not to be spared one drop of the cup of bitterness; that to her had been assigned the task of Sisyphus, the ceaseless rolling upward of a stone that as ceaselessly rolled down; the continual re-establishment of Evelyn in the shrine of her husband's heart. And there would be no end to it, even after John's return. So long as these two had need of her, heart and brain and hands would be at their service. She did not definitely think this, because true heroism is unaware of itself. "It feels, and never reasons; and therefore is always right."