Confessions of a Thug

by Meadows Taylor

"No, no," said the boy; "I did not fall. I saw—Alla save me! save me, uncle! Oh, look at their eyes and faces—there they lie. Oh, kill me, I cannot bear it! I shall die."

Unhappy child! he had again seen their faces,—we had never thought of the dead. One of the bodies lay close to us, the distorted features grinning horribly; and it had fallen against a bank, so that he saw it sitting half upright—a dreadful spectacle for a child.

"Take it away, take it away!" he shouted, in his infant voice. "I shall die! Oh, bury me! I shall never forget the face and the eyes—they will be ever before me!"

"Away with them!" cried I; and as I turned again to the child, he had sunk on his face in the sand of the road, and was endeavouring to hide himself in it,—he was in strong convulsions.

"Alla! Alla! what shall I do!" cried Peer Khan. "Oh, Meer Sahib, by your soul, by your mother's honour, do something! Save that child, and I will be your slave till the end of my days; I will serve you on my knees,—I will be your menial."

"What can be done?" said I. "All we can do is to stay with him, and comfort him when the paroxysm is past. He will revive soon and forget all."

Poor boy, how he strove in his convulsions! He could not speak intelligibly; he foamed at the mouth; his lips grew livid and contracted; his eyes, when he opened them, seemed sunk into his head. I had never seen such terror before, nor could I have believed that it would have had such an effect on any one. We carried him to the edge of the stream, and by dint of bathing his face, and forcing water into his mouth, he partly revived. He had just opened his eyes again, when, by a miserable chance, they fell upon one of the turbans of the dead men, with which I had been wiping his face. It had an instantaneous effect on him; his screams broke out afresh, nothing could console him, and we were in dreadful alarm about him. What to do we knew not; we were far away from any human habitation; and even had we been near one, we dared not have called in any hukeem to see him, for his incoherent ravings would have too truly exposed our doings. We sat by the boy in fearful apprehensions that every throe and convulsion would cause his death; at last we raised him up and placed him on his pony, and had succeeded in conveying him about a coss while he was in a state of insensibility; but it was of no avail. Again he awoke from his temporary unconsciousness, and we were obliged to take him down, and lay him on a bank at the side of the road, while we fanned his face and endeavoured to compose him.

But he was greatly reduced in strength, his moans were feebler and feebler; and though he now opened his eyes and gazed calmly around him, it was but too plain to us that the delicate flower had been blighted, and was fast withering under the terror which possessed him. Peer Khan was in a dreadful state; he raved, he entreated, he prayed; he knelt down beside the poor sufferer, and bedewed his face with his tears, which were fast falling; but no mercy was shown him. We sat thus till long past mid-day; numerous travellers passed us, all commiserating the child's state of suffering, but they shook their heads as they left us, with a firm conviction that he must die.

And he did die! towards evening the pure spirit fled from the suffering body, and we were left alone in the wild waste with the dead.

"It is of no use lamenting now," said I to Peer Khan, as he sat, his hands clasped in anguish, rocking himself to and fro, and moaning and sobbing as though his spirit would break. "It is of no use, brother, the boy is dead, and we must carry the body on to the stage, which is not very far distant."