My God, I am Thine,
What a comfort divine,
What a blessing to know that my Jesus is mine.
Now she had read and sung these lines scores of times before, but they came this morning with a new power to her soul.
‘I am Thine!’ ‘My Jesus is mine!’ she exclaimed. ’Lord, it is true!–I do believe it! My sins are forgiven. I belong to Thee!’ and her whole soul was filled with light and joy. She now possessed what she had been seeking all these weeks–the assurance of Salvation! And then what do you think she did? She threw on a wrapper, and, without waiting to dress, hurried across to her mother’s room, and tapped at the door.
‘Come in,’ said her mother’s voice; and Katie, her face shining with joy, burst into the room. ’Mamma, mamma, I am a child of God! My sins are forgiven–Jesus is my Saviour!’ she cried, flinging herself into her mother’s arms. And this was the same Katie, who had been so shy and backward that she had never before dared to speak about her spiritual anxieties, even to her mother! Ah! what a change real conversion, or change of heart, had made.
For the next six months Katie was so happy that she felt as if she were walking on air. ‘I used to tremble,’ she tells us, ’and even long to die, lest I should back-slide or lose the sense of God’s favour.’
But as time went on she learned, as we all have to do, to walk by faith, not by sight, and to serve and follow the Saviour whether she had happy feelings or not.
But you must not suppose, because Katie had the assurance of Salvation, that therefore she had no more fighting. No–indeed, her fighting days had only just begun.
One of her great difficulties, which many Corps Cadets will understand, was that she felt so nervous about doing anything in public. No one, of course, asked her to speak–such a thing was never dreamed of; but the lady who took the Bible Class which she attended regularly would now and then ask her to pray. ‘Miss Mumford will pray,’ the lady would say, when they were all kneeling together.
But Katie was too shy to begin, and sometimes they would wait for several minutes before she had courage to say a few words. ’Don’t ask me to pray again,’ she said one day to her leader; ’the excitement and agitation make me quite ill.’
‘I can’t help that,’ was the very wise answer; ’you must break through your timidity; for otherwise you will be of no use to God.’