During their performance, which was similar to that of the first party, although less gracefully executed, a new feature was added to the exhibition. An attempt at side scenes was evident, though I confess that for the first few minutes I was at a loss to imagine the intention of the very primitive machinery that was introduced. A couple of frames, similar to those on which linen is dried in England, were placed on a line about twenty feet apart, while, in the centre, a low railing of about six feet in length divided the distance. A poor old wretch, with a rope about his neck, was then tied to each frame, and made to squat down upon his hands and knees, to represent a watch-dog; and some green almonds were scattered about him for his food.
These miserable individuals, whose hired and voluntary degradation made me heart-sick, were both of them old men, whose beards were grey, and whose age should have exempted them from such an office as their necessities had induced them to fulfil. Beside these were placed two youths dressed as Chinese, with long braids hanging down their backs, and feather fans in their hands; not very unlike the figures which adorn the old china in the cabinet of an antiquary. Next came forward a procession composed of all the trades of Constantinople, from the Jew who vends fried fish at the corners of the streets, to the Frank merchant, who, when he closes his office, becomes one of the “Exclusives” of Pera.
Of course, the Frank was very roughly handled. His hat was struck off, and made a football for all the ragamuffins by whom he was surrounded; and the comments which were uttered alike upon his costume and his country were by no means courteous or conciliatory. But it could scarcely be expected that more delicacy would be observed towards a Frank than had been shown to the women of the country; and, this specimen of bad taste apart, the procession was the best point of the performance; as the individuals who composed it appeared to have been principally “taken in the fact,” and forced upon the scene; thus affording faithful rather than flattering representations of their several callings.
When the procession moved off, the serious business of the drama was resumed; the three females re-entered on the scene, accompanied by their mother, and a Greek serving-man, laden with their parasols and essence-bottles; and followed by two thieves, who concealed themselves behind the Chinese statues, for such I found that the two quaint figures who had so quietly walked to their places were intended to represent. After a vast deal of absurd grimace and buffoonery, rugs were spread in front of the low railing, and the four females and the Greek servant seated themselves, to listen to a tale told by the old woman.
While they were thus engaged, the melancholy Jacques of the previous act stole upon their privacy, when an absurd exhibition of screaming and fainting took place; during which the two thieves contrived, without any attempt at self-concealment, to possess themselves of the cachemires and handkerchiefs of the ladies, and, moving a few paces apart, they began to divide the spoil; when the buffoon, in his turn, prowling about the neighbourhood, discovered the theft, and, raising a hue and cry, at which the dogs were let loose by the party, hastened during the confusion to seize upon the booty of the robbers. The outcry attracted the attention of the Cadi, who entered, accompanied by his attendants, to ascertain the cause of the tumult; when the ladies, with tears and shrieks, declared the amount of their losses, and demanded justice.
Of course the good taste which had made a jest of the feelings of their allies, and the morals of their women, would not permit the Turkish comedians to spare their judges; and accordingly the Cadi was a huge caricature of humanity, with spectacles as large as saucers, and a beard of sheep skin. A hurried trial ensued, in which, while the Cadi was ogling the females, the buffoon was making himself merry at the expense of the Cadi; the executioner with his bastinado, and the clerk with his ink-horn and parchment, were both forthcoming; and the drama ended by the capture of the thieves, and the restoration of the stolen property!
A confused dance, accompanied by the wild, shrill chanting of the dancers, which I can compare to nothing but the orgies of a troop of Bacchantes, succeeded the departure of the actors, and the whole arena appeared in motion. The drums and tambourines gave out their loudest discord; gold and silver glittered in the sunshine; arms were tossed in the air; the long tresses of the performers floated on the wind; and I was delighted when the appearance of a troop of Bedouin Arabs, summoned to Stamboul expressly for the occasion, possessed themselves of the open space to exhibit their feats of strength and address. They were magnificently attired in coloured satins, and formed a very curious group; but their accomplishments would scarcely have secured for them an engagement in a respectable English booth. It was altogether pitiable.
When I at length contrived to escape from the crowd, I left a party of the dancing boys performing their evolutions in the Kiosk of the Pashas. Their Highnesses had not yet had a surfeit of the senseless pastime; and the youths were reaping a golden harvest.
The days are gone by in which people were wont to talk of the “Wise Men of the East.”