Tchaikovsky worked very little while at Borjom, only spending an hour a day at the instrumentation of the “Mozartiana” Suite.
At the commencement of July Tchaikovsky left Borjom in response to a telegram from his friend Kondratiev, who had been removed to Aix-la-Chapelle, in the hopes that the baths might prolong his life for a few months. Kondratiev’s condition was so critical that Tchaikovsky could not do less than interrupt his own cure and join his friend as soon as possible.
To Modeste Tchaikovsky.
“Aix-la-Chapelle, July 16th (28th), 1887.
“I do not dislike Aix—that is all I can say. What is really bad here is the atmosphere, saturated as it is with smells of cooking, cinnamon, and other spices. I think sorrowfully of the air in Borjom, but I try to dwell upon it as little as possible. However, I feel more cheerful here than I did on the journey. I see that my arrival has given much pleasure to Kondratiev and Legoshin, and that I shall be of use to them.”
Diary.
“Aix, July 22nd (August 3rd), 1887.
“I sit at home full of remorse. The cause of my remorse is this: life is passing away and draws near to its end, and yet I have not fathomed it. Rather do I drive away those disquieting questions of our destiny when they intrude themselves upon me, and try to hide from them. Do I live truly? Do I act rightly? For example, I am now sitting here, and everyone admires my sacrifice. Now there is no question of sacrifice. I lead a life of ease, gormandise at the table d’hôte, do nothing, and spend my money on luxuries, while others want it for absolute necessities. Is not that the veriest egoism? I do not act towards my neighbours as I ought.”
To P. Jurgenson.
“Aix, July 29th (August 10th), 1887.