Mynheer Ruissen took Herr Meyer to one side, and communicated to him what business had brought me to Hamburg, whereupon Herr Meyer without further ceremony invited me to sup with him.
"I hope"—here impatiently interrupted the chair—"you don't intend to waste more of our time by an enumeration and description of the various dishes you partook of?"
"No, your honor, though it would not take long to tell what we had for supper. Herr Meyer placed before me nothing but bread, cheese and water. He could not say enough in praise of the bread and cheese, and he boasted that the water, which he said was from the Elias fountain, possessed the most remarkable properties. While I ate, he examined in turn each of the vessels I had taken from the bag and placed on the table, exclaiming over every piece, and making a peculiar noise with his tongue against the inside of his upper teeth:
"A baptismal basin! Tse-tse-tse! How could you dare to take this? A censer! tse-tse-tse! Young man, did it never occur to you that you were defying Satan when you put this into your bag? A communion-cup! tse-tse-tse! I should think your soul would be oppressed with its weight of sin! And—actually!—the Holy Virgin's diadem! Woe-woe-woe, to you, miserable sinner!" I could listen no longer to his lugubrious comments:
"Oh, hush, Master Meyer," I interrupted, "what use to talk like that? You needn't think to frighten me with your lamentations. I am a Lutheran like yourself—rather let us talk about the value of these things: What will you give for the whole lot? But, before we talk business, bring me something more palatable to eat and drink. Your bread and cheese and water are not to my taste."
"Very good, you shall have something else," with sudden alacrity responded Master Meyer, whose opinion of me was evidently improving. He hurried to the kitchen, and soon returned with some salt fish, and a jug of good cider, which he placed before me.
Then he proceeded to appraise the church vessels, and the diadem, telling me the while that I ought to be thankful his dear old friend Mynheer Ruissen had led me to him. How easily I might have fallen into the hands of the papists, who would certainly have imprisoned me—and perhaps put me to death; or into those of the Jews, who had swarmed from Spain into Hamburg, and were ruining all honest tradesmen. The rascally Hebrews would offer only ridiculously low prices for articles they suspected had been acquired by means not altogether legitimate, and would give in payment for them counterfeit money. And, wasn't the cod-fish I was eating most appetizing?
After he had examined my treasures two or three times, he said he would give me six hundred thalers for the lot—and that I might drink all of the cider into the bargain.
"See here, Master Meyer," I replied, "your fish is so salty it makes one want to drink continually, and your cider is so sour, I would rather not eat your fish than to have to quench my thirst with the cider. And, moreover, I will take my treasures to the Jews' quarter, where I shall no doubt find some one who will give more than a paltry six hundred thalers to a poor shipwrecked traveller for a lot of articles that are worth at least twenty times the sum you offer."
At these words my worthy host beat his hands together above his head, and exclaimed: