In connection with this subject, the inquiry suggests itself whether, in the "excessive externalism of the times," due prominence is given to the practice of home-duties as a part of religion? Whether the spirit of the New Testament is carried, as it should be, into the every-day concerns of life? Is not the giving largely to public objects of benevolence sometimes suffered to supersede the duty of "considering the poor," and "bringing him that is cast out to our house?" Are not the claims of a popular charity readily allowed, while the inevitable ills of life, of which every family must have its share, are sometimes permitted to remain unsoothed by the voice of sympathy, and the gentle ministry of skilful hands and a loving heart? We may even go to church, when we should offer purer incense to Him who sees the heart, by performing the humblest domestic labors at home. Let me not be misunderstood. The public institutions of religion have claims upon us which we cannot innocently set aside; but alas, erring mortals that we are! our piety is seldom symmetrical and consistent. We are prone to love publicity. We find it easier to give money, to enlist our energies in behalf of benevolent societies, to go with the multitude to the house of God, than to practise, in the retirement of home, the "charity which suffereth long and is kind, which envieth not, vaunteth not itself, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things, and never faileth." Can we not learn, while we do the one, not to leave the other undone?
Chapter without Title
Style of living.—Consistency.—Economy.—Neatness.—Habits of regular attention to family concerns.—Perplexing days.—Company.—Arrangement of family work for a week.—First instructions to domestics.—Patience.—Good temper.—Observance of the Golden Rule.—Self-government when accidents happen.—Sunday privileges.
Consider in the outset what mode of living best befits your station, resources, and obligations to others; and so adjust your plan that consistency[1] and appropriateness shall appear throughout. It is much better to adopt a style of expenditure below your means than above them. Of the unhappy effects of this last we have many examples in our country. A very little advance in the style of living, creates an additional expense greater than would at first be believed. That little sentence, "I can do without it," has saved thousands of dollars for future exigencies. Prodigality is as fruitful of mischief as Pandora's box, and no amount of wealth can justify it. Habits of wasteful expenditure are almost always accompanied with selfishness and a cold heart towards the claims of the poor. Be conscientious, therefore, in the practice of economy. Family comfort can hardly be found without it. Neatness is essential to it; for though there may be neatness without economy, there cannot be economy without neatness.
Accustom yourself to take good care of every thing you possess.
The best managers probably have, at first, a few disagreeable lessons to learn, in the loss of things forgotten or neglected for want of experience in having the entire care of a family. But it is to be hoped there are not many who lose five or six hams eaten by the rats, or forty yards of Russia linen laid upon the snow to whiten, and forgotten till reduced to a pulp fit only for the paper-mill.
Be economical without parsimony, liberal without waste, and practise the best methods of using your possessions without having your mind wholly absorbed by them.
In your arrangements for the table, have reference to the work which is in hand, so that dishes which are easily cooked shall be provided for those days when most work is to be done. A want of consideration in this particular often provokes ill temper, and may even occasion the loss of a good domestic. This is one of the errors which those are liable to commit who are unaccustomed to household labor. Provide a variety of food; a frugal table, with frequent change, is much more agreeable and healthy than a more expensive one, where nearly the same things are served up every day.