“But—but—You told me—you said—the doctor said—”
“That I should never marry. Just so! That fact remains. Piers knows; I did not deceive him; he knew months ago. He came up to interview Dr Greatman himself. We know that we can never marry, but we love each other, and mean to take what happiness remains. No one ever forbade me to be engaged.”
“How can you be engaged? What for? Engaged not to be married? It’s absurd. What could you say? How could you explain? What would people think?”
Vanna laughed—a short, hard laugh. Still Jean had not congratulated her, nor said one loving word.
“If it is a false position, it is just those ‘people’ of whom you speak who force us into it. The conventions of society don’t allow a man and a woman to enjoy each other’s society undisturbed. To be engaged is the only way in which they can gain the liberty. Therefore that is the way we must take. There is nothing else to be done.”
“And—when you don’t marry? You are both well off, and not too young. People will expect you to marry at once, and when you don’t—”
“That is our own affair. They will be told at the beginning that it will be a long engagement, and however much they may wonder among themselves, they will hardly have the impertinence to question us on the subject. I imagine they will be polite, and kind, and congratulate us. I don’t think there will be many who will hear the news without speaking one kind word.”
The inference was undisguised—was intended to be undisguised. Jean flushed again, and knitted her delicate brows.
“I don’t mean to be unkind, but it sounds so wild, so impracticable, so utterly unlike you, Vanna. Where will you live? How can you meet? You are only twenty-five. People are so ready to talk. What do you propose to do?”
“To go on with our lives. I have money, thank goodness. I must have a little house—it won’t be rich and luxurious like yours—just a little corner where I can put my things, and feel at home. I must make a sacrifice to convention and have a sheep dog, too, I suppose—some lonely woman like myself, who will be thankful for a home. She can look after the servants, and the cleaning, and understand from the first that she leaves me alone. Then I shall find some work. I have an idea working out in my head which I hope will bring interest and occupation. And Piers shall come to see me. We shall have a place where we can meet in peace and comfort.”