I have a private theory that this custom is cherished and kept up by men from a conviction that their hats are much safer in their own sight in the drawing-room than they would be downstairs in the hall. New umbrellas have been taken instead of old, as we all know, and new hats are quite as tempting, if not more so.
The card should not be sent up.
Do not send your card up when making a call. This is reserved for business men. The servant asks your name, and it must be given very distinctly. It will then be announced in a loud, clear voice when the door is opened. Should the hostess show by her manner that she has not recognised the name, its owner must recall himself to her memory by saying, “I am Mr. So-and-so. I had the pleasure of,” &c., &c., explaining the circumstances that led to the call.
Leaving the card on departure.
The visiting-card must be left on the hall table when the caller goes away, one card for the ladies of the house, and one for the gentleman or gentlemen, whether these latter have been present or absent during the call.
Should the lady called on be “Not at home” the cards are given to the servant.
Rendering an important service.
When a man has rendered an unknown lady some really important service, as in the case of a street accident or some other disagreeable circumstance in which he has been able to avert from her some unpleasantness which she would have otherwise incurred, the lady will probably ask him to let her know to whom she is indebted for so much kindness. The proper course to pursue is to disclaim any special obligation, but if the lady persists, it is then good manners to give the name. Should the gentleman feel very much interested in the lady, he may say, “I should very much like to call to-morrow to find out if you are none the worse for your adventure.” She may then give him her address, and he would give her his card.
A trivial service.
But this would all be very much out of place if the affair had been some mere matter of common courtesy, such as picking up some article dropped by a lady and restoring it to her. A gentleman in such circumstances raises his hat and retires as quickly as possible, lest the lady should imagine that he could base a claim to her acquaintance on the performance of so trivial a service.