“Madam,
“When I was a boy at Eton school, I remember it was a Principle of the Law Marshall (practised there): that he who gave the second blow was the beginner of the Fray; and there is something in it, if you consider it; however at this time, it will help to excuse me from the Presumption and folly of inviting you to a Combat, in which I can have no hopes of success. When I read on, and observe with what accuracy and finesse you trace the motions of the Heart, and call Nature from the inmost recess’s to discover plainly what arts is usually employ’d to conceal; I am confounded.
“It is true indeed that you have named the Passions and Qualifications of the person to be Described, but what Work will a man make, who should think that he had got all the Secrets; tho’ he was unacquainted or incapable to understand it, to such a man. Alexander the Great and Diogines (sic) are Characters alike, for they were both Actuated by the Spirit of Ambition, one who wanted a new World to display himself in, the other valued nothing beyond the Tub he lived in. In the midst of this Philosophical enquirey about the Passions, you very artfully turn to your Family Affairs and give (I doubt not) excellent directions to the Cook wᶜʰ shows you to be as great in the Kitchin as in the Closet, which indeed is the only way of being great in either.
“Nothing, I think, is more disagreeable than Learning in a Female, when the Mistress studys Newton, which perhaps she neither does nor ever will understand, to the absolute neglect of her Children and Servants. You conclude by putting in your claim for the Lady’s Privilege, which is a very extensive one; give me leave to tell you a short story.
“There was a poor Printer who had got a little sum of Money, by publishing the last words of a dying Criminal, and he grew so fond of last words, that after the Man had been long dead, he published another paper called MORE last words. Thus you see, Madam, that I have in spite of eighty-three, without a Voice, and with shaking Hands, endeavoured to follow your Strain of thought, which I shall always look upon to be a very good direction. My time of Life calls upon me to think of other Subjects, and the greatest of all to Justifie the ways of God to men. This theme can never wear out, it takes in the whole of God’s Dispensation, with respect to the Religion of the World, and shows by the connection in the several parts that the whole is the work of perfect Wisdom.
“But I am going to preach instead of Answering a short letter, you will pardon me for looking back upon my old profession, and believe me to be, with the greatest Sincerity,
“Madam,
“Your most obedient Humble Servᵗ,
“Tho: London.
“P.S.—Mrs. Sherlock and Mrs. Chester desire their respectfull compliments.”