DANCING AND EASE OF MANNER
MAN is a gregarious animal, and eagerly seeks the company of his fellows. In civilized society men and women gathered to dine, to converse, to dance, to play games, to watch others indulging in various sports or pastimes. Out of this intermingling at social gatherings there has gradually developed an accepted code of conduct termed "good manners," which are as stringently binding as any law enacted by a legislature. And there are penalties for violation of this code, that are surely imposed upon the luckless offender, ranging all the way from a snub, a sound or gesture of disapproval, to social ostracism.
"Manners maketh man" is an ancient aphorism that has a very wide application. While the forms and standards of what constitute good manners change with the times, their essential basis is always the same—a deference to, and consideration for, those with whom one is thrown in contact. Courtesy, politeness, helpfulness, and other evidences of good breeding and careful training, are the outgrowth of a desire for eliminating selfish instincts. The rude man or woman is an egotist, seeking to assert his or her individuality without regard for the sensibilities of others.
Aside from the willful violation of those unwritten laws that have come to govern social intercourse, there are many who err because of excessive self-consciousness, which makes it difficult or impossible to put themselves at ease among those with whom they would like to associate. They are painfully aware of their own surplus ego; they are constrained and awkward; they feel that in some way they are outsiders, that, as the slang phrase puts it, they do not belong. It is probable that more social failures are due to this trait than to any other cause.
Against this self-conscious attitude a thorough training in the dance is a most effective remedy. The shy, constrained, awkward boys and girls mingle with their companions on terms of ordered freedom and equality. They are taught grace of movement; the spontaneous expression of their individuality is modified by contact with their associates; they acquire a graceful walk and carriage. To follow the various movements of the dance in harmony with the music takes their thoughts away from themselves, and provides an escape from the dread self-questioning: "Am I doing the right thing?" Success in mastering the technique of the dance brings assurance and poise, and adds immeasurably to the capacity for adjustment to environment that marks the well-mannered members of what is in the true sense of the word "good society."
