One solution never occurred to Fabiola’s mind, that he was all this because he was a Christian. She only saw the problem in another form; how could he be all that he was in spite of being a Christian?
She turned it variously in her mind, in vain. Then it came to her thought thus. Perhaps, after all, good old Chromatius was right, and Christianity may not be what I have fancied; and I ought to have inquired more about it. I am sure Sebastian never did the horrible things imputed to Christians. Yet every body charges them with them.
Might there not be a more refined form of this religion, and a more grovelling one; just as she knew there was in her own sect, Epicureanism? one coarse, material, wallowing in the very mire of sensualism; the other refined, sceptical and reflective. Sebastian would belong to the higher class, and despise and loathe the superstitions and vices of the commoner Christians. Such a hypothesis might be tenable; but it was hard to reconcile to her intellect, how a man like that noble soldier could, any way, have belonged to that hated race. And yet he was ready to die for their faith! As to Zoë and the others, she had heard nothing, for she had only returned the day before from a journey made into Campania, to arrange her father’s affairs.
What a pity, she thought, that she had not talked more to Sebastian on such subjects! But it was now too late; to-morrow morning he would be no more. This second thought came with the sharp pang of a shaft shot into her heart. She felt as if she personally were about to suffer a loss, as if Sebastian’s fate were going to fall on some one closely bound to her, by some secret and mysterious tie.
Her thoughts grew darker and sadder, as she dwelt on these ideas amidst the deepening gloom. She was suddenly disturbed by the entrance of a slave with a light. It was Afra, the black servant, who came to prepare her mistress’s evening repast, which she wished to take alone. While busy with her arrangements, she said, “Have you heard the news, madam?”
“What news?”
“Only that Sebastian is going to be shot with arrows to-morrow morning. What a pity; he was such a handsome youth!”
“Be silent, Afra; unless you have some information to give me on the subject.”
“Oh, of course, my mistress; and my information is indeed very astonishing. Do you know that he turns out to be one of those wretched Christians?”
“Hold your peace, I pray you, and do not prate any more about what you do not understand.”