Ma laid down her knife and spoon, she being quite entirely through, and looked me in the eye.
"I will remember them words, daughter," she says very solemn.
And it's the truth I never noticed how serious she was about it until I come to look back on it nearly three weeks later.
IV
And during that time which has been so immortally fixed in writing by the grandest book with the same name, I was as busy as the great American cootie is supposed to be on his native hearth—only it ain't that piece of furniture but another, of course. Do you get me? I'm afraid so! Well, I was as busy as what you think. To begin with I called a committee-meeting in the privacy of my grey French enamel boudoir where I wear my boudoir cap and have the day-bed hitched and this committee meeting consisted entirely of myself and the two fool dogs. And after I had gone through all the motions, I appointed myself a sub-committee of one to carry out the meeting's resolutions and do all the work.
This is about what would of happened if I had done it the regular way and asked Ruby Roselle and Maison Rosabelle and the other girls. We would of had a mahogany table and a gavel and a pitcher of ice-water and a lot of hot-air and a wasted morning and in the end I would of been the goat anyways, so I thought why not do it single-handed in the first place and be done? I could print all their names on the leaflets and they would be perfectly satisfied.
So having got over the necessary formalities as you might say, I accepted the nomination and got to work. Fortunately I wasn't doing anything except a solo dance at the Palatial at supper-time and one picture. And so I had most of my days to myself. The Fixings on the Avenue grew and blossomed and so did my contribution to the Welcome Home Committee. I didn't get to go to any of their meetings but I don't imagine they even missed me at the time. And while the arches and other motion-picture scenery was being as completed as they ever would be, so was my list. My monument took up less space, but when you gave it the once-over it seemed maybe a little more rain-proof than the others. Apparently all there was to it was slips of paper six by eight with this printed on them. At the top it says:
"welcome home"
"howdy boys, and our heartfelt thanks!
do you need a job? here are three hundred
and twenty and a victory note
goes with every one!"
Then come the list. I will put down a part of it so you can realize what a assortment of things has to be done to keep the seive in civilization.
4 handsome juveniles for motion-picture work—stage experience unnecessary.
2 experienced camera men.
2 marcel-wavers.
6 chemists, Marie La Tour Complexion Powder Co.
2 salesmen, Marie La Tour Turkish Cigarette Co.
16 waiters, Palatial Hotel.
1 traveling man, Marie La Tour Silk Underwear Co.
2 experienced lineotypers, Motion Picture Gazette.
2 experienced pressmen, Motion Picture Gazette.
1 publicity man, experienced, Motion Picture Gazette.
3 fillum cutters.
1 stylish floorman. Must be handsome and refined, not over 30. Apply Maison Rosabelle, Hats and Gowns.
1 orchestra complete, with leader. Apply "Chez La Tour" (my old joint of parlour-dancing days).
30 chorus men.
2 sparring partners for Madame Griselda, the famous lady-boxer.