“You were in the House at the last session, I believe?” she inquired.
“Well, madam,” he said, “I was in the House, but the Senate had me for about forty-five dollars when we adjourned.”
Her Failing
They were two Houston girls, and they were taking a spin on their wheels. They met a fluffy girl who didn’t “bike,” out driving with a young man in a buggy.
Of course they must say something about her—as this is a true story and they were real, live girls—so one of them said:
“I never did like that girl.”
“Why?”
“Oh, she’s too effeminate.”
A Disagreement
“Dat Mr. Bergman, vot run de obera house, not dread me right,” said a Houston citizen. “Ven I go dere und vant ein dicket to see dot ‘Schpider und dot Vly’ gompany de oder night, I asg him dot he let me in mit half brice, for I was teaf py von ear, and can not but one half of dot performance hear; und he dell me I should bay double brice, as it vould dake me dwice as long to hear de berformance as anypody else.”