Professor Pikestaffe, Ph. D.,
While wandering over land and sea,
Once on the plains of Timbuctoo
Met a giraffe.
“Why, how d’ ye do!”
Exclaimed the amiable Pikestaffe.
“I’m really charmed, my dear Giraffe!
I’ve thought so much of you of late,
Our meeting seems a stroke of Fate
Particularly fortunate.
I long have had upon my mind
Something concerning you; be kind
Enough to seat yourself, and pray
Excuse, if what I have to say
Seems personal!”
“My dear Pikestaffe,
I shall be charmed,” said the Giraffe,
“To hear whatever you may say.
You are too kind; go on, I pray.”
“Well, then,” said Pikestaffe, “to resume,
You are aware, sir, I presume,
That though with your long neck at ease
You crop the leaves upon the trees,
Your legs are quite too long, and make
It difficult for you to slake
Your thirst—in other words, you’ve found
Your neck too short to reach the ground.
Indeed, I’ve often wept to think
How hard it is for you to drink.
“To right a wrong we must, of course,
First try to ascertain the source;
And in this case we find the cause
In certain geometric laws,
Which I will quickly demonstrate
(How lucky that I brought my slate!).
“Well, to begin, let line A B
Be your front legs; then line A C
(A shorter line) your neck shall be.
Measured, ’twill only reach so far,
When bent down toward the ground, as R.
Then R’s your head stretched down, and shows
How far the ground lies from your nose—
Though if the ground lay not at B,
But R, you’d reach it easily.
Suppose it then at R to lie,
And draw for ground line D R I.
Your head then touches ground at R—
But now your feet go down too far!
My compasses then I will lay
On A and B, and make round A
A circle crossing line D I
At two points. Mark them X and Y;