Money for nothing

by P. G. Wodehouse

"I did not get up to look for swallows' nests."

"But you said you were looking for swallows' nests."

"I did not say I was looking for swallows' nests. I merely said I fancied I saw a swallow's nest...."

"You couldn't have done. Swallows don't nest in July.... April."

The sun was peeping over the elms. Mr. Carmody raised his clenched fists to it.

"I did not say I saw a swallow's nest. I said I thought I saw a swallow's nest."

"And got a ladder out and climbed up for it?"

"Yes."

"Having risen from couch at five-thirty ante meridian?"

"Will you kindly stop asking me all these questions."