Sermon XCIV.
Forgiveness Of Injuries.
If therefore thou offer thy gift at the altar,
and there thou remember that thy brother hath anything against thee,
leave there thy offering before the altar,
and go first to be reconciled to thy brother;
and then coming, thou shalt offer thy gift.
—Gospel of the Day.
There are few things in common life, my dear brethren, more surprising than the fact that some people seem to consider themselves good Christians, and well worthy to receive the sacraments, who have a grudge against some of their neighbors and never speak to them; perhaps never answer, even if spoken to by them. These people seem to think, I say, that they are worthy to receive the sacraments; and this not only at Easter, but, it may be, quite frequently. Some of them, I fear, consider themselves to be pious and devout; they say, it may be, long prayers every night and perhaps also in the morning—though, if they really thought of the words on their lips, I do not know how they could get through one Our Father. "As we forgive those who trespass against us" ought to stick in their throats. They will not speak to those persons who, as they think, have trespassed against them; they wish, then, that God should have nothing to say to themselves. "Forgive us," they say to him, "as we forgive; we will not speak to others, so do not thou speak to us; turn thy back on us, pass us by; that is what we do to our neighbors. Cut us off from thy friendship, send us to hell"; that is what every Our Father means in the mouth of these detestable hypocrites when they say, "Forgive as we forgive."
How these people get through their confession and receive absolution is as surprising as that they should make the attempt to do so. They are caught, no doubt, once in a while, but it is to be feared that a large proportion of them slip through the priest's fingers, either by saying nothing about the sinful disposition in which they are or by telling a lie to the Holy Ghost and to their own hearts, if they would but examine them, by putting all the fault on the other party. When the other party appears, then we come nearer to the truth. "I spoke to So-and-so," they say, "but got no answer."
Now, let it be distinctly understood that to refuse to answer any one who speaks to us with a good intention; to take no notice of a word or a salute, given with a view to renewing friendship, or even out of ordinary politeness, is, in almost every case, a mortal sin. Of course I do not mean that is so when the omission comes from inattention or carelessness; no, I mean when it is intended as a cut to the other party. About the only instance in which it can be allowed is that of a superior, who has a right to take the matter in his own hands, and can put off reconciliation for a time without danger. A father, for instance, may keep his child at a distance for a while in this way as a punishment for an evident offence; but I am speaking of equals, one of whom can have no right to punish the other.
But you may say: "This person has injured me grievously. He or she ought to beg my pardon." Perhaps this is so; though often, if you could see your own heart and that of the other as God sees them, you ought to beg pardon as much as he or she. It is rare that an unprovoked injury is done by any one consciously and without what seems a pretty good excuse to himself. But even granting that the injury is really grievous and unprovoked, do you expect your neighbor to go down on his knees to you, or to humble himself by a formal apology, not knowing how it will be taken? Would you find it easy to do such a thing yourself, however guilty?
No, by turning him off in this way you put the balance of injury against yourself, however great may have been the other's offence. No one should dare to go to Communion after such a slight unatoned for. And yet even brothers and sisters have done such things, and, I fear, received Christ's Body and Blood with this sin on their souls.