The King compelled himself to play his necessary, outward social part. But he was uneasily aware, all the time, inwardly, that Judith had noticed his embarrassment and that she was likely to resume her unexpected attack at the first opportunity. His intuition proved correct; but only partially correct. Judith was quick to take advantage of the first of the maid's temporary absences from the room to return to more intimate talk. But she struck, at once, a quieter, graver note.
"What is it, Alfred?" she asked. "Do I trouble you? I am sorry. It was selfish of me. I knew that I was playing with fire, of course. But—a woman grows tired of leaving everything unsaid."
Her implied appeal, and her insistence on her feminine weakness—a thing unprecedented in her!—moved the King. He felt ashamed of his own caution.
"If I had the right to make pretty speeches—" he began.
Then he checked himself abruptly.
What was the use of evasion? Had not Judith and he agreed that plain speaking was their only hope? Judith had spoken plainly enough. The least he could do was to speak plainly, too. And, suddenly, at the back of his mind, now, were thoughts, which he had never suspected in himself, clamouring for expression,—
"But I haven't the right!" he exclaimed. "I haven't any right to be here, really. I see that now. I am in an utterly false position. I ought not to be here. I ought not to have come here, as I have done. It was not fair—to either of us. It was asking too much of—both of us. Why haven't I seen that before? I shut my eyes to it, deliberately, I am afraid. It was a mistake. It has been a mistake all through. I have been absolutely selfish. I have thought only of myself. It is only right that I should have to pay for my mistake. But the payment is all on your side. It has been give, give, give, all the time, on your side. And take, take, take, all the time, on mine. And I can make no return—"
"The giving all on our side! You have made no return!" Judith cried. "It isn't true, Alfred. You know it isn't true! But, even if it were true—a woman loves a man who allows her to give to him."
"Isn't that just the trouble?" the King exclaimed, exasperated by the conflict of feeling within him into a flash of unusual insight.
Then the parlour-maid re-entered the room.