He considered the strong contrary winds, the very threatening weather, the fact that their present position was unknown, that the ship must need repairs, the necessity for going to a place where she could be either got into harbour or careened on a coast, and that all was ended there. He had very prominently in his mind that at the first difficulty or danger there would be a want of resolution or of management, or of the desire to apply a remedy; for which reason it might with truth be said that he was without pilots on whom he could rely, and that from some other persons there was little to be expected or hoped. Then there were his own infirmities; so that altogether the case was one of evident danger.
Putting on one side the ordinances of God, His high and secret decrees, and how limited was his understanding to enable him to decide whether what happened was or was not in conformity with them, the sorrowful Captain said discretion was of little use to arrange things, nor the mind to undertake business, though it be easy, if there be any one who has the will and power to take away all his just value or great part of it. Sovereigns, he said, when they undertake great enterprises, ought to distinguish, make clear, and strengthen their orders in such a way that the persons to whom their execution is entrusted can have no room for doubt, nor to contend, nor any one who can make excuses; and not pledge men so that they find themselves in positions so confused and difficult as had the Captain. For he could not tell what advice was mature nor what was inexperienced, nor the choice he should make, nor the resolution he should take which, if followed, might lead at least to part of the remedy for the evils which were menaced in so important a matter.
He arranged to go, as we were then steering to N.E. and N. as far as 10° 30′ S., the latitude of the island of Santa Cruz, which being settled, the Captain made the following discourses.
In the first place the S.E. wind had the same force, and if with such threatening weather he steered to the W. in search of the island of Santa Cruz, it might remain at the E., and, without the danger in which he would have to put the vessel, he would place himself still more distant from help if he did not make the landfall.
Secondly, he knew, for he had already made the voyage to the Philippines, there was the beginning of those furious westerlies which last at least until the first days of October, for which cause it was impossible to go there at that season.
Thirdly, to undertake the voyage to Acapulco; the distance was very long, and it would be necessary to cross the equator without knowing which time would be the best; while there was very little water left and no meat: for the Chief Pilot had buried the casks among the ballast where the bilge-water sucked in, and for that reason it had all turned bad.
He felt that he had many sick, and no medical man, nor the necessary comforts to nourish them.
He knew that in the ship he had some few friends and all the rest enemies; and those he had to help him and take part of his duties were those who were soonest tired, and were least able to manage things, or to treat of more than the security of their own persons, while they disliked work.
He did not certainly know what had happened to the other two vessels; so that he reflected that only the ship in which he was, was available to bring the news of the discoveries and how much they imported, and that the same news should be given by those who remained. He made other very sorrowful discourses, and the following, which were more consolatory.
The first was that many exploring ships and fleets, full of men and riches, have been lost in known seas, without, in many cases, having secured their objects, either in whole or part.