THE BARBER. ( Raises his hand to his ear, knocking the pin out of THE CUSTOMER's hand ) I don't hear well on this side. Try the other.
THE CUSTOMER. A thousand dollars! I'll give you a thousand dollars!
THE BARBER. I'm afraid it won't do, sir. You see, the young lady who runs the news stand up-stairs says—you won't interrupt me this time will you?—she says it's important to keep customers in sight. There's nothing so bad for trade as an empty shop.
THE CUSTOMER. Oh, have you no heart? It's almost too late now! Every second is worth a dollar to me!
THE BARBER. Well, sir, it will console you to know that my time is worth very little.
THE CUSTOMER. Please let me up! If I wait two minutes longer, I might as well shoot myself.
THE BARBER. I shan't object, sir.
THE CUSTOMER. Oh! Oh! Oh!
THE BARBER. So you are beginning to feel some regrets? I'm glad to see it. I always thought you'd regret sooner or later. ( Shaving. ) By the way, sir, haven't you recognized me yet?
THE CUSTOMER. Recognized you?