A CARD COMEDY
This may be otherwise described for programme purposes as “A Royal Row,” or “A Row in a Royal Family.”
Preparation. Card mat loaded with two kings of hearts: one of them taken from the pack to be used: the other a spare card. The king of clubs and queen of hearts to be laid on top of pack. The two flower-pots on table.
Presentation. Advancing to the company, palm off the two top cards, and hand the pack to be shuffled. This done, force the palmed cards on two different persons. Then say, “I want you to take notice that I do not handle or tamper in any way with either of the cards you have chosen. Please lay them yourselves face down on this mat. Thank you. Now still without touching them I will put them temporarily in this elegant flower-pot, which you observe is quite empty. You see that it has neither top nor bottom, and nothing between. You couldn’t have anything much emptier than that, could you?”
Having duly exhibited the flower-pot (this by the way must be the one without pocket) you let the two drawn cards slide off the mat into it, the two concealed kings going with them. Then, assuming a perplexed air, you say, “I don’t know why it is, but I have that peculiar sensation in my left thumb that always means that something has gone wrong. What it is in this case I can’t imagine, but I must find out before we go further. As the two chosen cards have passed out of my hands, I may now ask the ladies who drew them to name them.
“The queen of hearts and the king of clubs, you say? Ah! that accounts for it. When those two cards come together there is sure to be trouble. The queen of hearts is a bit of a flirt, and the king of hearts is very jealous, particularly of the king of clubs, who is rather a gay dog, though he is old enough to know better. I fancy I hear some sort of commotion going on in the flower-pot.” (You look into it.) “Yes, it is just as I feared. The king of hearts has found out that his queen has gone off with the king of clubs, and has followed the queen post-haste. Here he is, you see.” (You plunge hand into flower-pot, and take out and exhibit the two drawn cards, and with them one of the two kings of hearts.) “It’s too bad, for as a matter of fact the queen of hearts doesn’t really care two-pence about the king of clubs. In fact she has even been known to call him a giddy old kipper.
“But I can’t have my arrangements upset by these little family jars. To teach the king of hearts better manners I shall put him in solitary confinement. We will drop him into the other flower-pot, which, as you see, is also empty.” (The card is in this case not dropped through the pot, but into the pocket.)
“Now we shall be able to get on. No! my left thumb tells me that there is still something not quite right.” (Glance into second flower-pot.) “Upon my word, this is too bad. The king of hearts has already got away and followed the queen again.” (Lift flower-pot, and show that the king has disappeared.) “I thought I had him safe, but his prison, as you see, is empty, and here he is again in the first flower-pot.” (Show the three cards accordingly.) “He is too many for me; I can’t show you what I had intended. I must give it up and try something else.”
Variation. Load mat with a single king of hearts and the queen of clubs, the latter taken from the pack. Proceed as before up to the putting of the king in prison, and then exhibit the queen of clubs, as having come in pursuit of her spouse, the patter being modified accordingly. The imprisoned king of hearts will still be found to have escaped, but in this case to have returned to the pack.
For lack of the two flower-pots, the drawn cards may be dropped with the concealed pair into a borrowed hat, and the jealous king made to escape from a card-box, or some similar appliance.