Now, before I left Twentifold Towers, and returned to the smell of our works,—which had changed very greatly for the worse, while I was away down here,—Sir Roland Towers-Twentifold (being well sixteen, and tall for his age, and of long experience, at one of our largest public schools) took me aside into a saddle-room, wherein he was learning to smoke cigars, and put into a nutshell all the essence of the British Constitution. How I wish, I could remember what he said! But it sank into my mind, too deeply ever to be brought up again; and it blended with, and flourished in, the flower of my life; as liquid manure reappears in bright flowers, "inscripti nomina regum."
"Tommy," he went on, as soon as ever he had put into ten words the lessons of a thousand years, "you will see now, how it is that we don't get on. We never get a man to take the lead, who knows his own mind, and will stick to it, and throw up his situation, rather than carry it on, against his own lights. And then, there come a lot of fellows swarming for first pull, as we rush to the swipes-can after cricket; and the louder any cad is for his rights (which are sure to mean the wrongs of some quieter chap), the surer he is to get served first. Now, can you call this Government?"
"I don't pretend to know much about it," I replied, for we had held some conversation of this kind before; "but my father says, that any business carried on, as the Government of this country is, would have to put its shutters up, within three months, if it started with a hundred thousand pounds. But you mustn't tell any one that he said this; for I believe, by the way he would not answer me, that he has got a fine Government contract, by this time."
"Your father is quite right; he is a man of strong sense;" Sir Roland made answer, as soon as he could, after taking a large puff of smoke the wrong way; "let him get every farthing he can from the Government, and then he will be able to understand them. Why, I might not have got the knowledge that I have, except for a trick that they wanted to play about my cousin Counterpagne, when he comes of age. Counterpagne is soft, and his mother no better; and being of an ancient Tory race, they expected to have things made smooth for them. But I can't stop, to tell you all that now. You are to come back at Christmas, and you shall hear it then. Counterpagne is to marry little Laura, to prevent any mischief to our property, and influence; and between us, we shall send six members up, besides Counterpagne himself in the Peers of course, and me in the Commons, for the Towers' own hole. But, Tommy, look at me, and tell me this. If under a Government, that calls itself Conservative, as the present fellows do, such things can be done, as I was going to tell you; what is to be expected of the Radicals? I'll tell you what; if the Constitution lasts till I am of age, which seems a most unlikely thing—I shall want you, and every man of sense I know, to collect, and put your shoulders to the wheel. Remember that."
I did not at all understand what he meant, although he had spoken several times to this effect. But I promised to do all I could; and was pleased with the thoughts of becoming so important.
"Tommy, you will rise," my friend continued, without asking what I was thinking of; "such a fellow as you are, must go up, unless he makes a downright fool of himself. You can beat me all to fits, in Greek and Latin, though you have only been at a dirty little private school. You have got a most wonderful face of your own; so easy-going, and sweet-tempered, that it makes every fellow think you slow, and drop all jealousy about you. And more than all,—and that alone should be enough to make your fortune—you can draw the attention of the whole world upon you, whenever you please, by going over their heads. I have been very good, in letting you off, without sending you up, a lot of times. But you know that I have done it upon one condition—you must cultivate the art, without any one's knowledge, and be ready to go up, at some great moment, when I give the signal. Pretend, for the present, that you can't do it; but practise, as I told you, more and more. I have shown you the muscles you must try to strengthen, and the places where you must lay on fat. It is nothing in the world, but a kind of swimming; and there everything depends upon your being quite at home. Now, remember what I say; and when you come down at Christmas, I shall put you through your paces, and expect to find you perfect."
"Oh, Roly," I replied, "you talk as lightly as all the men of science did about me. I will do my very utmost to please you, I am sure. But I never expect to be of any service to you. You are learning to smoke, and your smoke goes up; and that makes you think that I can do the same."
"Exactly so, Tommy. A great deal of it went down, until I understood it. And now look at that!"