"Kentucky fought for Washington in the Revolution; she has, thus far, prosecuted the present war without fear; nor will she shrink from even shedding personal gore where the provocation is the offspring of Yankee lowness."
He said this, with exceeding majesty, my boy, and I felt that I was indeed involved in complications with the Border States.
"I understand you, my warrior," says I, calmly; "but if this affair is to come off immediately, where are we to find our seconds?"
The Kentucky chap hastily called a small boy to him, and says he:
"Sonny, just run out into the street and ask any two gentlemen you meet to step in here for a moment." "You see," says he, turning to me, "it's better to have two brigadier-generals for seconds, as a battle might take place while we are away, and there are no private soldiers to spare at present."
"Yes," says I, thoughtfully, "that's very true."
The brigadiers were obtained, my boy, and, with murder in our hearts, we started forth to seek a spot appropriate for carnage in private. It was just the hour of mid-day, and we were wending our sanguinary way in silence, when, upon turning a corner of one of the public buildings, the sound of sweet music fell upon our ears, and we came suddenly upon a brass band and a party of singers, who were discoursing witching strains under one of the windows.
I listened for a moment, and then, says I: "What may be the occasion for this noonday melody?"
The Conservative Kentucky chap motioned for us to pause, and says he, feelingly: "It's a serenade to Secretary Welles of the Navy. Let us heed the voice of the singer."
Here a young vocal chap, under the window, commenced singing the following words, in a fine tenor manner: