“No, not under that. I have no head for that.”
“What! no head for physic? If you’d said you had no stomach for it I could have understood you; but—well—what did you put it under; sundries, eh?”
“I’m afraid, Joseph, that I have not taken note of that in my extract—your dear father used to call the thing he did with his cash-book at the end of the year an extract—I think I’ve omitted that.”
“Just so,” said Tipps, jotting down with a pencil on the back of a letter. “I’ll soon account to you for the discrepancy. Here are six bottles of wine to Mrs Natly, the railway porter’s wife, at three-and-six—one pound one—not provided for in your estimate. Any more physic, I wonder? H’m, subscription for coals to the poor. Half-a-guinea—no head for charities in your estimate, I suppose?”
“Of course,” pleaded Mrs Tipps, “in making an estimate, I was thinking only of my own expenses, you know—not of charities and such-like things; but when poor people come, you know, what is one to do?”
“We’ll not discuss that just now, mother. Hallo! ‘ten guineas doctor’s fee!’ Of course you have not that in the estimate, seeing that you did not know Netta was going to be ill. What’s this?—‘five pounds for twenty wax dolls—naked—(to be dressed by —)’”
“Really, Joseph, the book is too private to be read aloud,” said Mrs Tipps, snatching it out of her son’s hand. “These dolls were for a bazaar in aid of the funds of a blind asylum, and I dressed them all myself last winter.”
“Well, well, mother,” said Tipps, laughing, “I don’t want to pry into such secrets; but here, you see, we have seventeen pounds odd of the discrepancy discovered already, and I’ve no doubt that the remainder could soon be fished up.”
“Yes,” sighed Mrs Tipps, sadly, “I see it now. As the poet truly says,—‘Evil is wrought by want of thought as well as want of heart.’ I have been assisting the poor at the expense of my trades-people.”
“Mother,” exclaimed Tipps, indignantly, “you have been doing nothing of the sort. Don’t imagine that I could for a moment insinuate such a thing. You have only made a little mistake in your calculations, and all that you have got to do is to put down a larger sum for contingencies next time. What nonsense you talk about your trades-people! Every one of them shall be paid to the last farthing—”